


Summertime

by Rozmaryn



Category: Smosh, Smosh Games, Smosh Squad
Genre: F/M, I Don't Even Know, Janis Joplin is a rock, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-13
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-12-01 20:16:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 37,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11493963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rozmaryn/pseuds/Rozmaryn
Summary: I don't know, I'm bored. And I love Smosh. So here you go.Inspired a bit by R_Sublett and her work "Who Knew?". Check it out if you like mine - hers are better.Though, there's no plot connection between those fics.





	1. Trouble in Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. This time gonna try to write something that is not only about hot gay sex scenes. Wish me good luck. And enjoy!

Damien was looking at his phone, smiling a bit at the sight of photo on the screen. It was Shayne sitting on the couch huggig his dog. Damien could easily recognize it was taken in Shayne's flat cause he remembered the pattern on the couch - he had seen it before many times. But he wasn't really paying attetntion to the furniture or even to the dog he actually liked very much. He observed his muscled bare armsa and shoulders, his dark tank top, a bit tighter than he those he would usually wear so his pecks and abs were able to see through the fabric. His skin looked a bit wet, just like his blonde messy hair, so he probably just came back home from gym or maybe it was just hot at his flat? It was summer, it was sunny and hot everywhere in LA right now. But he payed his attention mostly to the grinning face of the guy. The text Shayne send him after the picture was "Just a Hot&Dog" and it was clearly ironic because ven Shayne wouldn't make joke that bad. Also the douchy smile on his face could tell that... It made Damien chuckle a bit, though.

"Can I order one, please?" he texted back, grinning. They flirted like that very often, it was nothing special. Just two dudes making fun, as they said... Or something.

Then he saw, that both of Shayne's arms vere visible at the photo. He realized that someone else must've taken the picture... But who could it be? Who may be at his flat right now, he thought. Maybe he was just at the gym with Wes and he came home with him... Or maybe he picked someone else? The blonde would definitely say him if he dated someone, they were friends for too long. But what if he didn't... After a while Damien just chuckled again, realizing how stupid his thoughts were. Why would I even care about such things? He may invite anyone he wants, it's his place, he thought. It was stupid of him to worry like that... He chuckled once again at the thought.

"What are you laughing at?" asked Courtney. For a moment Damien just looked at her completely confused. He probably had pretty dumb look on his face, because the girl just cracked, almost spilling coffee from her cup.

"Sorry, I got distracted, Shayne texted me and ya know..." he tried to explain, blushing a bit shyly. But the girl didn't look like she was offended or something.

"What did he send?" she asked, smiling. She definitely wasn't angry - Damien actually has never seen her angry, though he has heard some stories from Shayne and the rest of the Squad.

"Just a stupid picture, nothing important... Sorry, again" he apologized and showed her the photo. She smiled, showing her white teeth - she definitely had a pretty smile. When she was like that her face looked even more kind and friendly. The sight of it made him fell warm and nice and relieved, just like Shayne's wider smile would make him happy, no mater how bad would he feel before seeing it. Though the blonde guy's smile was sometimes made fim also feel kinda... shy? Why am I even comparing them?, he thought. "Nevermind... May you repeat what you said earlier?" he asked her, putting the phone on the table and flipping it so he wouldn't see the screen.

"Sure. I said 'So I kicked the dog, pretty hard to be honest, and..."

"What!?" he interrupted, a bit louder that he wanted to and some of the people around them gave him some looks. But Courtney just laughed at him.

"Shhh, let me tell the story from the beginning..." he started again and the brunette listened carefully. It turned out that Courtney actually did kick the dog, but it was in defence of her own one, which was sick and weakened. It calmed Damien much, and at the end of the story she laughed again, which also made him laugh.

They talked for some more time, drinking coffee and laughing, having a great time. Then Damien's phone buzzed again, so he picked it up. It was just notification from some update, but then he saw that Shayne responded few minutes ago. "The come'ere and take it" and then another one "Mum and Dad aren't home for tonight.". Damien smiled again. It was one of their running gags, acting like they would be some teenagers that still live with their parents and must take every opportunity to hang out when their alone at their houses. Before he responded, he looked at the clock and realized that it was already past eight. In summer dusk was later so it was always a bit confusing for him to remember that.

"It's a bit late, they're probably gonna close the place soon..." he started. They already drank their coffee, so it seemed like a right time to leave the place.

"Yeah, I guess so." he responded, smiling.

"Would you mind if I walk you back home?" he asked kindly, with a bit of ironic gentleman manner.

"Oooh, I would be very grateful, sir" she said, laughing a bit. So Damien paid for their coffee and Courtney went to the bathroom, so he waited outside.

"Can't, bae, gotta finish that volcano project" he texted back Shayne, still in that teenager-high school style. He waited only a while before he got a respond.

"Gotta take care of m by mself then", and soon another: "What are you wearing?". Damien just cracked, laughing loudly and gaining another looks from folks around, on the street. Before he could answer Cournter returned, so they finally left.Their date was going very well so far.


	2. One Good Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a dude chilling with his dog. Or maybe not really.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one i more like Shayne's POV, as you will see. It will switch like between chapters very often, just letting you know.
> 
> And I know, great chapter summary. So detailed, I'm impressed by myself.

Wes has left Shayn'e house few minutes ago. The big guy came just for like half an hour after gym - they were sometimes training together, somtimes also with Damien, it was nothing special. He has been doing it with Damien for a long time as they knew each other very long. THey both gained their strength and great shapes thanks to each other's help at the gym. He liked giving his friend advises, a helping hand or even more getting it from him. Then he just felt like he has a buddy that he could spend some time with, work out together, laugh, talk and everything. It was a nice feeling... that's kinda why he was going to gym, even without Damien, like this day. It always reminded him of this feeling, even if his best friend wasn't around.

The blonde was sitting on his couch. Though with one hand he was playing softly with his dog and the tv was playing last season of GoT, Shayne couldn't focus or one of his favourite shows or on his pet, just because of the small object on coffee table - his phone. He was texting with Damien, just as usual, but now his friend was responding kinda slowly. Shayne assumed it was for the same reason he didn't come to the gym this afternoon, and it made him worry a bit.. because he didn't know what this reason was. He just knew that his friend had something to do, but Damied hasn't actually told him what. It wasn't like the blonde always had to know what the other was doing, where was, with whom and all, but... he usually kinda did. Especially now, when they started working together again and living closer to each other in LA. So he was wondering what his buddy could be doing, where could he be... and with who? He would definitely tell him if he had someone, didn't he? But if it was just one, small date, his friend wouldn't if it was anything worth telling him about... No, he usually does say whenever it's serious or not, he thought. So he waited for Damien's response to his invitation. He texted him, that he can come over to his place so they could hang out. He guessed that he probably couldn't, but he was hoping that at least he would tell him what he was doing, why was he busy.

And then, finally, phone buzzed and Shayne immadietely reached for it, almost scaring the dog out with his reaction. But as soon as he saw the message, his smile faded. "Can't, bae, gotta finish that volcano project", Damien answered and even though Shayne was almost sure, that his friend would decline the invitation, it still made him kinda sad. But he didn't let anyone know that- so he responded quickly.

"Gotta take care of m by mself then" he texted him one message and soon he sent another one. "What are you wearing?" he joked, and smiled again. He knew Damien would like it, he could imagine his wide smile, those brown eyes filled with joy, his loud laughter... It made him kinda relieved and calmed. Still, it meant he was alone for tonight... but he was fine with it. It wasn't the first time, and definitely also not the last one. So he just leaned back and tried to focus on the show again. And it worked... for a while.

Some random scene in the episode reminded him of one of his old friend from school. It was summer, maybe that's why it also reminded him of his holidays when he was younger. He was often spending his times with his friends by some lake. And that, of course, reminded him of Damien and one vacation he has spent with him.

***

It was getting really late, definitely past nine, they could see nice, reddish sunset by the other side of the lake. Rest of their friends left to the lakehouse to prepare something to eat and drink after almost an hour of swimming and playing in water together. Now only Shayne and Damien left, sitting on the deck, with their feets touching warm water... Or it just seemed warm, because it was getting a bit colder outside. Though, they weren't cold. Sure, theye were wearing just some swimming trunks and both were still a bit wet, but also were sitting under one big towel. Damien forgot to take his from the lakehouse, so they just used Shayne's one together. It wasn't a big deal for any of them... It actually felt nice, beacuse that way they felt warmer - their shoulders touching, their bodies heating up other one, both covered with towel.

They were still talking, cracking jokes and even singing quietly. They drank a lot less than their friends did, but still they felt a bit more... encouraged, than usual. So their voices just kept echoing through the lake. But it seemed like noone was around... only birds, fish, some frogs and crickets in the grass... It felt amazing.

"Just look at it" Damien said after they stopped laughing and got a bit quieter. He was looking at the sun hiding slowly below the horizon. He looked like he was stunned with the beautiful view. His brown eyes reflected it, so Shayne could just look at them, not at the actual sun, if he would like to.

"Yeah... Amazing" he said and Damien turned his face towards him with a soft smile. The blonde realized, that he was still looking at his friend, not at the sun, when he spoke... but it didn't seem like the brunette noticed anything. Shayne blushed a bit, though and turned his face away. That soft smile, those eyes... it made him feel... weakened? He didn't know what to do. That feeling was just overwhelming him, making him a bit uncomfortable... but also good in some way. It just felt right to look at his friend face, to stare at it for a long time. BUt he knew that he couldn't do that... it would be weird, even if no one was around. No... especially if no one was around.

"It's getting a bit cold" Damien said, moving closer to him, probably only to make them warmer... But it didn't made Shayne warm. It made him hot. He could hear his heart beating loudly, it must have been obvius to Damien as well... but it didn't seem like he noticed. So, after a while, Shayne also moved closer and adjusted the towel on them.

"Yeah... We can return and get inside the house, if you want" he said, not soundning too confident.

"I want to wait until it dissapears fully" he answered, ponting at the sun, and looked at his friend "You can stay with me if you want" he added, and then turned his face to the sun. Shayne wasn't sure, but it looked like his friend was also blushing a bit.

"Sure... I can wait" he responded. And so they just sat still, looking as the sun was leaning lower and lower.


	3. Half Moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They walk and they talk.

The evening was warm and nice, as i was supposed to be in july.The sunlight was almost completely gone, so the lanterns around the streets were turned on. Damien never liked that part of the city - the lights. Of course, he prefered to see the road he was walking, it was much easier and safier this way. But he couldn't really see the see the stars in LA, at least usually.

"Ah, man... It would be the perfect view tonight without those lights! There are no clouds!" Courtney complained, ponting at the sky. And she was right - there was no clouds, it wasn't raining for some time and it didn't seem like it would in near future. The brunette looked at her, smiling but also a bit surprised. "I mean, the stars, you know? I liketo watch the sky at night..." she explained.

'Yeah, yeah, I got it... It's just... I was just thinking the same thing" he said, and she responded with a nice smile.

"Oh, really? I know one great place in LA where you can actually see the sky even when the light are on..." she started. For a while they were just talking about their favourite places in LA, constellations, weather and a lot of more, different things. It was a nice conversation, Damien was truly enjoying it and the girl looked like she also did like it. So here they were, strolling slowly by LA streets, moving closer to Courtney's house step by step. Guy hoped that their walk would last long, because he still wasn't sure what to do when they reach her place... Should he just leave or do something more? What if she asks him to come in? Should he agree or just leave in a kind way? He really didn't know. So he tried to just enjoy their time.

And he actually had a lot of time to do that. It seemed like Courtney also had no need to come back home faster, so she was actually slowing him down sometimes, ponting some random star when she would see some through the lights.

"At least the moon is visible" Damien said. And it was, not very big, but definitely visible in it's sickle shape.

"In like a few days it should be new moon... The view is usually the best then, I think" she answered.

"Then maybe we should go and see it when it comes? Somewhere outside the main city, maybe?" he offered, acting very casualy before he realized, that he kinda just asked her for another date. And so he blushed, pretty hard - but it was a bit dark, so he hoped that the girl didn't see that.

"That sounds very nice, Damien" she agreed. Her voice was sweet and kind, especially when she said his name like that.

"Perfect. We have a... deal, then" he said, slowly, trying to find other word than 'date'. Courtney chuckled softly when she heard him, but didn't say anything. For a short while, they were walking in silence, both lost in their thoughts. Usually in a situation like that, people look on their shoes, hands, somwhere below... But these two were looking at the sky.

Damien felt really pleased by that. He hadn't had a chance to just focus on the stars with a company in a long, long time. Actually, very long... His ex girlfriend didn't really liked that, she had no interest in stars. Other girls before her were just the same in that case... One of the few people that wouldn't have nothing against just watching the sky in silence was Shayne. The thought of that reminded him how they sometimes on mary various occasions were just laying or sitting outside together, both just quiet and fully focused on the great views above them...

Before he got lost in his memories even more, he saw that Courtney was rubbing her arms a little bit, like she felt cold.

"You cold?" he asked, and befre she could answer, he was already putting his jacket on her shoulders. SHe tried to protest for a while, but he assured that it was no problem for him and he didn't feel cold in any way. Then she accepted his 'gift' and put on the jacket. She didn't wear it for long, because soon they arrived to her place.

So they walked towards the doors, quiet, and Courtney opened them. Then she stood in the doorstep and turned to face the guy behind her.

"So... Wanna come over? I can make some tea if you want to?" she asked, very politely and Damien was sure, that she actually meant it. But he also caught her yawning few times on their walked, he could see that she was a bit tired. It was a long day at work, she definitely needed some sleep.

"I would love to, but it's really late, and don't want toexhaust you even more" he answered, smiling a bit.

"Yeah, maybe you're right" she agred, laguhing a bit. But she didn't step back or close the door, Damien also was still standind in the same place as before.

"So... Emm..." he started, not sure what he wanted to say. He felt like he was supposed to do something, and he kinda knew what - it wasn't his first time to date someone. He could kiss her for goodbye, on the cheek, on the lips, he could also just hug her or even only say goodbye... He could also still get inside and do even more. There were many opportunities... And decide to take one. So he leaned in for a kiss.

It wasn't anything too passionate, just a quick, soft kiss, no tongue, no rubbing each other bodies. He moved his face away and looked into her blue eyes, trying not to blush again.

"Goodnight, Courtney" he said, stepping back.

"Goodnight. I had a great time today" she responded. And then he left and she closed the door slowly. He realized that he forgot to take his jacket from her, but he didn't care. So he just walked slowly to his flat, with his head full of thoughts and his eyes staring at the sky.


	4. Piece Of My Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sun rises and next day comes.

Shayne was sitting ine their office by his desk, just scrolling through some random site on the net. It might sound boring, but i really wasn't... every picture he found included Damien, somehow. Some of them he already knew, those were some photos from various convents, from backstage of 'So Random', but also from some of their trips. He didn't remember that they took so many photos on their trips, but he didn't actually care at the moment. He even found some from the lakehouse they've visited with their friends one time - on the same vacation he was thinking about night before.

Then, out of nowhere, Noah appeared.

"Waddup, waddup, waddup!!" he shouted, hugging Shayne from behind. "Looks who I've found!" he shouted again, ponting at Damien, who also entered the room.

"Hey, man, I missed you" the brunette said, hugging his old friend. He felt warm and nice again his skin. He could feel his breath on his shoulders. He joyfully hugged him back, patting him on his back few times.

"God, I missed you so much too" he responded, and they finally broke the hug and both sat by his desk. Apparently they were alone in the room, because Noah left it - Shayne didn't notice when he had disappeared. But he didn't care at the moemnt.

"I really missed you, Shayne" Damien repeated himself, sitting very close to the blonde and resting his hand on his shoulder, massaging it in a friendly way.

"I know, it was a long time... I couldn't stand it." Shayne said, enjoying his friend's touch. His hand was sending sparks of pleasure over his body, he couldn't think straight. I feel bad without you, he thought. But couldn't say it... He just felt like he couldn't say it. He didn't know why.

"Shh... I understand. I missed you, Shayne" he said once again, and leaned towards him. Their lips met and they started to kiss, slowly but with passion. The blonde could feel his friend's lips on his cheeks, his neck, his shoulders, chest, nose... He also was kissing every part of Damien's skin that he could reach. They were getting more and more passionate in their actions, both started to moan and groan loudly. There was also some other noise, louder and definitely different. It was highpitched, too high for a man to make it... And it was still getting louder, and louder, and louder...

***

And so he woke up when the noise of the alarm in his phone became impossible to resist. He turned off the annoying sound as fast as he could with his morning lack of sight and then leaned back at the bed. He stayed like that for a couple of minutes, trying to get his mind and body ready for the whole day... It usualy was much easier for him. But now he felt a bit dizzy... he couldn't really remember what he was dreaming about, but it definetely wasn't an usual dream. When he focused, he could remember only Damien's face with a bit weird aroused look in his eyes. He still wasn't sure, but this and the fact that he awoke kinda... exited, were suggesting that it was kind of erotic dream. And it might have been about Damien... The blonde couldn't believe that something like this happened and even though no one have seen it or could prove him anything bad, he felt embarassed and guilty. He felt like thinking or dreaming about his best friend like that was something really wrong... Like he betrayed him or something.

He finally made it to remove the sheets from his body, leave the bed and stand up. He definietely needed a shower. A cold one.

***

It took him longer than usual but he made it to the office mostly on the right time. He actually came before Keith, but it wasn't actually any challenge - the guy was always the last one to arrive, no matter what. But this time, he also realized that Courtney hasn't arrived yet, which wasn't that usual.

"Hi" he said to Olivia and Noah, and they responded the same way. "Why is Courtney late? Or she's just in bathroom or something?" he asked, but there was no jacket or bag that looked like on of Courtney's, so it seemed like she really hasn't arrived.

"I like that you didn't ask that about Keith" Noah commented, laughing a bit.

"Yup, she'll be late. She was on a date yester day, probably that's why" the girl answered, and both guys looked at her with surprise.

"Really? With whom?" younger guy asked. Shayne was also interested, so he just sat on the couch they had in the room, and waited for a response.

"I don't know, she didn't say... That's why I think it's someone we know" she said and both men looked even more surprised.

"Who didn't say wha?" asked Keith, appearing suddenly in the room.

"Wow, Keith! You're not the last to arrive!"

"Oh, damn, so maybe I turn back and leave, I don't feel like I should break it" he answered "Why Courtney isn't here yet?"

"She had a date, apparently" the blonde guy told him and soon added: "And probably with someone we know".

"Wha!? Oh, hell, that's interesting! Wanna make a bet who she banged last night!?" he asked.

"I don't think she's into that kind of first dates" Olivia said.

"Nevermind, so who's in?" the guy ignored her and repeated the question.

"I'm in, but I gotta go grab some coffee first. Want me to bring you some, guys?" Shayne said. After they made their orders, he walked out of the room and followed the corridor, heading to he exit. He wanted to go to the nearest coffee shop and return here, but when he at the doors, he had to quickly move away because a familiar body almost runned into him.

"Oh, so sorry!" Courtney said, but Shayne just laughed at it.

"That's fine, don't mind it. Gonna get some coffe, want some?" he asked. The girl looked like she was in a hurry and a bit nervous - he knew that she didn't like to be late. So he wanted to calm her down a bit. "Don't worry, I also just got here." he added.

"No thanks, I drank one in a bus. Gotta go!" he answered quickly, but still with a smile. Shayne noticed that there was something else different about her... Then he realized it was the leather jacket. It looked a bit too big, but it fitted her well - though it was hard to make her look bad.

"Nice jacket" he said loudly, when she was alreayd walking towards their office.

"Oh, thanks!" he responded quickly and quickly turned her face away. And the blonde could swear that her cheeks were red. 

So he fianlly left and went to the coffee shop. WHen he was standing in a lane, he was still thinking about the jacket and Courtney's unusual behaviour... Bu actually mostly about the jacket. There was a time in the past when he was more interested in the blonde girl - for some period he actually had a little crush on her. But it didn't work out - she had a boyfriend at the time, and when they broke up, Shayne already got used to treating her as just a friend. And it was also very nice - he liked to talk and joke with her, he didn't feel like he needed more.

But the jacket... Well, it was something different. He had similar one, though a bit lighter. He liked that type for very long time, he bought himself the first one when he was much younger, after he saw Damien i a similar one and the boy looked just so cool than the blonde felt like he had to get one like that. They both still had jackets like that, Shayne a lighter one, and Damien darker, of course. They were nice and comfy, not to heavy and thick so it wasn't usualy too hot in them in LA, but also more than some flanel shirt, so if the night would be colder they were just fine. THey also reminded him of many trips he had wearing one of them, many of them with Damien.

He was so lost in his thoughts about the jacket that he almost not realized that he was at the top of the lane and he could order his coffee. And so he did and returned to the office with four cups, for him and the rest of the squad, except Courtney. And he was almost at the door to their room, he heard a familiar male voice. He immadietely turned back and saw Damien, standing by the wall and talking with Courtney. They were smiling at each other and laughing. It wasn't like these two never talked to each other before - they were going along well so far. But this time it was different. They stood closer to one another, they looked straight at each other eyes with those smiles. And then, Courtney took off the jacket and handed it to the brunette.

Seeing that, the blonde guy just turned away and walked into the office, ignoring his best friend behind him. Probably ofr the first time in his life he just pretented to not see Damien, maybe except some jokes, but they didn't count. And he felt awful.

"Here it is, you coffee" he said to his friends, who were sitting by the couch. Also Mari was here and they all were clearly talking about with whom COurntey might have been on date night before.

"C'mon, Shanye, two votes for Sohinki, I voted for Wes and Liv-Liv is still thinking... What's your bet?" Keith asked, but Shayne wasn't really in a mood for bets. He just handed them their coffee and sat by his desk, turning on the laptop and trying to think of something else. "C'mon, c'mon, before she gets here!" his friend reminded him.

"I don't know, maybe Joven" he answered, not really thinking about his bet.

"Joven? Really? Why?" Mari asked, sounding very confused.

"Really, guys, I don't know..."

"But you said you wanna bet..."

"But I don't know." the blonde responded, a bit harsher than he wanted to. But before he could apologize, the doorso pened and Shayne quickly looked at his screen.

"Hi, guys, sorry I'm late!" he heard Courtney's voice "Oh, hi Mari!". And so the rest of the Squad and Mari just started casual conversation with Courtney, trying not to sound suspicious. But Shayne's wasn't paying attention. He tried to look at his screen, but he also couldn't when he saw Courtney's reflection in it. She was wearing dark leather jacket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wondering, by the way, if anyone already noticed what's up with the titles in this fic.
> 
> PS - New one may come much later, actually. Maybe even on Sunday. Stay tuned, though!


	5. Little Girl Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She has to think about all of this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, already hundred hits? Thanks, guys, and stay tuned for more.

She left the office together with Olivia and Mari for their lunchbreak and sat together in other room. Noah and Keith were supposed to order the food for them and bring it here, so they were supposed to wait here with Shayne and Mari. The blond guy though went somewhere else, at first she thought that he just went to bathroom, but he wasn't coming back for quite long... He also was acting quite weird this morning, espiecially towards her... He looked at her in a way that was very not usual for him.

"So, Courtney..." Olivia said, interrupting her thoughts "Was it Damien?" she asked.

"Of course it was, she's got his jacket" Mari said, smiling a bit. Courtney was at first a bit confused, and then embarassed.

"Well... Yes, we went out yesterday" she answered, blushing a little. The girls didn't say anything, just stared at her with anticipation.

"So girl talk? Maybe we should call Boze here then?" the blonde girl joked.

"Don't worry, I will tell her all the details later. Now talk, girl" Mari said in a demanding voice. She was joking a bit, of course... but also it looked like they were waiting for her answers and wouldn't let her go withour them.

"Alright..." she sighed, still not sure what to say "So... He was really nice. He's a cute guy, few times it looked like he wasn't litening to me, but not cause he was staring at my boobs or something, which is nice. He was actually very gentle and charming."

"Yup, I don't know him for long, but he's definitely a gentleman kind of guy" Mari said in approving tone.

'Go on" reminded Olivia "Where did he take you?" she asked.

"Oh, we went for a few cups of coffee. It was nice, we talked a lot, and when it got dark, he walked me home. We were talking the whole time, it felt like he really wasn't thinking only about geting laid" she continued.

"But...?"Mari asked.

"There's not 'but'. After we got to my place, I offered him to come inside for a cup of tea or something, but he said that I looked tired or something like that, I don't really remember. Then he just gace me kiss and left"

"A kiss? How was he?"

"The kiss was nothing really special, just a soft kiss, only a mit more than a peck on the lips. He has nice lips, by the way" Courtney explained, a bit shyly at the end.

"And what's with the jacket?" Olivia asked, pointing at it. Courtney was still wearing even though it was warm enough in the room. It just felt nice.

"Oh, it got a bit cold when we were outside, so he lended me it. I wanted to give it away to him today, but he said I can return it to him later..."

"So he's planning another date" Mari said, sounding very confident about her statement.

"Yeah, I guess..." Courtney said, not that much convinced.

"YOu wouldn't like to?" Olivia said surprised.

"No, no, it's not that... I would love to. I'm just not sure... It was a really great evening, it looks like he enjoyed it too but... I don't know. He's probably gonna ask me again and I will gladly agree. But I'm just not sure, I don't know why" Courtney said, looking at her nails.

"Girl, you're just nervous. It will be fine, don't worry... He seems to be a great guy..." Olivia tried to calm her, resting her hand on her shoulder and carresing it a bit.

"It's a bit funny though, cause for some time I was sure that you and Shayne were going to date or something..." Mari said wit ha smirk.

"Yeah, when we met I also thought for some time that he's hitting on me, and, well, I had nothing against it... But it didn't work out." the blonde responded.

'...and now you're dating his best friend" Mari ended. For a moment there was just a bit awkward silent.

"Well... Yes. That's kinda the reason why I'm not sure about all of this. If Shayne still has some feelings for me... I... I don't want to ruin their friendship" Courtney finally spoke, sounding nervous again. Now both other girls moved a bit closer, putting their hands on her back and shoulders.

"Okay, I have an idea, gurl, don't worry..." Olivia said "I can talk with Shayne about that, I can also ask Noah. The know each other also for quite long time, maybe he will know..."

"Yeah, and I can ask LCorn, he's friends with Shayne. And Wes's sometimes traning at gym with him, so I can also ask him for help" Mari offered as well.

"Well, if you think it's a good idea... But you now, be discreet" Courtney reminded them, but agreed to their plan, though. And it seemed like a perfect time to end their little girl talk, cause rest of the Squad just came with the pizza. Ian also joined them, so he, Mari and the Squad sat around the tables and started to eat, talking and playing around at the same time. Well, not all of them... hayne didn't seem like he was in a mood for talking. He actually didn't eat much as well, which was a bit unusual... And though every time when she looked at him he was looking somewhere else, most likely at his feets or  the table, she had a feeling that he was staring at her. But she wasn't sure, though... BUt definitely something wasn't right.

Then the door opened and familiar face appeared in the room. He smiled, looking at her with those brown eyes.

"Hi, guys!" he said, loudly, as usual.

"Hey, man! Want some pizza?" Noah asked him.

"Nah, thanks, Joven already ordered some food for us... Shayne, got a minute?" he asked. Courtney looked at the blonde guy, who seemed like paralyzed for a second. His muscles seemed tightened, espiecially on his jaw and neck.

"Sure" he answered quickly, though. He sounded very natural and normal, but something was definitely wrong with him... She couldn't figure out what, though. So he stood up, and left the room. THe rest of the Squad kept eating, and Courtney did so as well... but when her friends were talking and joking, she was lost in her thoughts about her date with Damien... and Shayne's strange behaviour.


	6. Catch Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shayne doesn't want to talk and Damien is not used to it.

His friend left the room just as Damien asked him, but he seemed a bit strange, though. He wasn't looking directly at his face, only somewhere around it, as if he was trying to not get into eye contact.

"Hey, sorry man for interrupting your lunch, but I gotta ask you something" Damien said quickly, though he was still observing his friend.

"Don't have to. What's up?" he responded. He sounded cool and calm, but it didn't seem right in some way... Damien was sure of it.

"Emm... You okay, Shayne?" he asked, trying to look into his eyes, but it was hard since the blonde was looking somewhere else every time.

"Yeah, I'm fine. But what did you want to ask me?". Now Damien was sure that something was wrong - the way he said he was 'fine', it just sounded 'wrong'. And for a very short moment he managed to look into his friend eyes - and he saw something there. Like an embarassment mixed with guilt and maybe even... fear?

"It's about tommorow, we were going to play pool... You sure you're alright?" he asked again and then Shayne gave him an irritated look. It wasn't just a sign of little annoyment, it seemed like Shayne didn't want to talk with him... He was not used to it. They had their fights in the past, but they usually were very clear. And now he had no idea why Shayne was angry at him... and it hurted.

"It's nothing, really. I'm just a bit tired... I haven't slept well tonight, that's all, sorry" he answered, sounding a bit calmer. "What about the pool? We 'were' going to?" he asked.

"Yeah... Would you be mad if we didn't go? We can go next week, I would love to, but..." he started to explain, and then chuckled and smiled a bit. "I... I was on a date with Courtney yesterday. Sorry I didn't tell you, but, you know... I haven't knew then yet if it's anything special. But now I think I would like to go on another, and, you know, tommorow seems like..." he continued, wanting to make sure that his best friend would understand the situation.

"Yeah, I get it. No problem man... Good luck!" the blonde answered, interrputing him. He was smiling a bit and sounded calm... Too calm. Or maybe I'm overreacting, maybe he's just not in a mood, it happens..., Damien thought. But he wasn't sure.

"Okay... Thanks, man. I really think I like her... So thanks" he said once again, looking into his friend eyes. And this time, Shayne also looked directly at his.

"Right. I wish you guys the best" he assured him. "Is that all?"

"Yeah, I think so... Thanks aga..." Damien started but before he finished the sentence, Shayne was already gone. So Damien returned to Smosh Games' office, where the chinese food was already waiting for him. But when he started to eat, he stopped after few bites. He apparently didn't want to it right now... So he just scrolled through some Instagram photos on his phone. It was thursday, so he found some old photos his friends posted... It was from one of their trip by the lakeside. It was a group picture, he was together, but also Shayne, with more darker hair yet... The brunette smiled at the sight of it. He remembered that place where they took it... It was on some small glade in the forest near the lake. The photo was taken during the day, but still it was quite dark and shady cause of the lack of light. But it was nice, still. Very nice...

***

They were walking in the forest, it was very dark and a bit cold... It probably wasn't the best idea. It was almost midnight, their hair was still a bit wet, they changed their clothes, of course, but still, they felt a bit chilly at first. But the bigger problem was that they weren't seeing almost anything in the dark - Damien had a bad sight also in the daylight, and now he sometimes had to hold Shayne's arm to not hit into tree or something. Because by accident they had splitted from the rest of the group, so they were practically lost.

But, surprisingly, they were fine with it. And with the coldness, darkness and everything. It wasn't the most comfortable situtation, but they could just talk, walk and hang out - and the fact that they were lost in the forest at night made it even more exiting, even more than another fact - they drinked some beer before, theye were teenagers on vacations, so it was quite obvius that they managed to get some alcohol. Now they had no more bottles with them, only a pack of cigarettes that they smoked together. But it was also almost empty, there were the last two in the pack cause they were strolling around the forest for like an hour or two.

"Dude... I swear, we already had passed this rock before" Damien said, ponting at some big stone near them.

"Shut up, you're blind... 'm the pathfinder here!" Shayne answered and walked closer to the rock, staring at it with a focused look. Damien slowly, step by step, walked after him, truly almost blind in the dark, reaching with his hands in front of him uintil he finally grabbed his friend arm. With a sigh of relief, he moved closer and also tried to stare at the stone. But he failed, of course so he had to use his other senses. So he put his hands on the stone and started to trail them on it, checking the shape and size of it.

"Hey! Stop it! It's a sexual assault! Do you even know her name?" Shayne said, trying to sound serious but it was obvious that he was almost cracking.

"Shh... I'm trying to!" the brunette answered and put his ear to the stone. "Her name's... Janis!" he shouted all of sudden after a long silence and it made his friend burst into laughter.

"Well, then hello, Janis!" he said after he stopped laughing, which tookhim a while. He said it with a lower voice and 'sexy' face (though Damien could only hear him, so he had to imagine the handsome smirk). "You come here often, sweetheart?" he asked again.

"Hey! Are you hitting on my girl? I saw her first!" Damien interrupted, punching Shayne lightly on the arm.

"A-ha, you 'saw' her? How if you can't even see me?" he responded, laughing at him.

"It was brighter then... And now I can recognize her by touch!" he reminded him, resting his hands on the rock again.

"Don't harrrrase her, you dork!" Shayne shouted, pushing Damien on the ground. But then karma striked against him and he stumbled over some root or something like that - he couldn't see what it was exactly - and landed directly on Damien chest. At first the taller boy groaned in pain, but then they bothed started laughing, loud and almost maniacally. They stayed liek that that, squirming a bit on the grass and rolling around, 'fighting' for domincace, each of them tried to get onto the top of the other. But it wasn't agressive, it was very friendly... but also exhausting. So, after few minutes, Damien finally had won, using his weight to pin the other boy down to the ground.

They were manting and gasping for air, but still laughing at the same time. Both of them were covered in sweat and a bit of dirt and grass or fallen leaves. They felt very comfortable like that, though.

"Well, maybe I can't see, but I can still defeat you" Damien said, smirking with satisfaction.

"You're just taller, shut up" the boy below him answered, though he didn't sound mad or angry in any way. He sounded very happy, actually. They both felt the wind on their skin at heard the branches moving above them. For a while they moved in a way that revealed some part of the sky for them and thanks to it, Damien could actually see something. For example, Shayne's face below him, his smile, his face, a bit wet from sweat and dirty from the ground right now and also his bright eyes reflecting the moonlight in amazing way.

"Hmm... Gotta take that back, now I  _can_ see you, Shayne" he said with a calm tone. The other guy also stopped laughing and became more calm. They were looking into each others eyes in silence until the branches moved again, making Damien almost blind again. He could still smell and hear his friend though... And feel his body below him, of course.

"Are you comfe down there?" he asked, joking again.

"Actually, it's warmer that way" he answered, also laughing.

"Really? Well then, I would lay on you more often if I knew that" the burnette said, realizing what it could meant after a while. He laughed though, and got onto his feet and then helped Shayne do the same, reaching his hand to him.

"Thanks, buddy, always knew I can relay on ya"

"Everything for my best friend" he said and they started to walk in a random direction again. For a moment they were silent, just walking slowly through the forst, smoking last of their cigarettes. And after few minutes of strolling, they finished them and were left with nothing... Or so thought Damien.

"Crap... These were the last ones, rights?" he asked his friend. It was very hard for him to see, but he thuught that he saw a weird grin on Shayne's face... "What? What's going on?"

"I got something better from the house" he said in a bit suspicious way and picked something from his pocket. Damien couldn't see what it was, but he had a feeling. And when Shayne put it into his hand, he smiled widely.

"Weed? Oh, you junkie!" he laughed, but grabbed his lighter, though. Shayne picked the joint first and after a while passed it to his friend. He puffed it as he was thought to and managed to cough at the end, which was nice. Then Shayne took it again and also puffed but when Damien wanted to get it for another on, Shayne took a step back, laughing.

"And who's junkie now?" he shouted, walking back even more. Damien tried to walk toward him, but then his friend stepped back even more. He was faster than him in the dark, he had definitely a strong advantage.

"Oh, c'mon, are you my mum!?" he shouted back.

"Nope, do I look like a woman? Call me daddy, boy!" he answered and they both stopped their actions right away and everything got quiet. Damien could hear Shayne hissing at his mistake. They a had an unwritten rule to not talk about fathers. Never. It was just... hard for them. Shayne didn't have a good relation with his dad, who was always dissapointed of him or at least acted like he was. And well, Damien's dad was... dead. And though he always acted cool about that in front of people, Shayne knew that it was very tragic for him. He and his mother were the only people that he trusted this much to show his emotions about his loss.

"Man, I'm sorry..." Shayne said and walked towards him, resting his hands on Damien's shoulder. But he stood silent, looking at his their shoes... Or just looking in their direction, cause he couldn't see them. Usually he would jest go on ignoring it but now, when he drinked a bit and it was very late his mind worked a bit different, his emotions were different. But he was determined to not cry in front of Shayne right then.

"I'm really sorry Damien" the shorter boy whispered again, hugging him. And Damien gladly hugged back, liking the warmth of his friend's body.

"You don't have to, really, it's nothing..." he finally made it to say something. He actually sounded cool and didn't drop even a single tear.

"C'mon, we should get to the house... He have a long way, probably" Shayne said, stepping back and reaching his hand to Damien's, offering a support in the darkness. He was still holding the joint in the same hand, though.

"I have a better idea" the burnette said, smirking and then grabbed the joint and then started to run away. It was very hard, but somehow he managed to not stumble or hit some tree to hard. THough he had to be slow and carefull.

"Oh, you bastard!" Shayne shouted after him and he could hear his steps as he was following him.

"Come on! Catch me, daddy!" he shouted back and bursted into laughter, just as Shayne. And he kept running.


	7. Ball and Chain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *warning*  
> There may be some a bit more adult scenes, just letting you know.

It was probably one of the worst days in Shayne's life. Everytime he tried not to think about Damien or Courtney, they were suddenly appearing in front of his faces, few times even together, which was even worse. At least everyone stopped asking him if he was okay. Though, those hours at the office and even on the corridors, bathrooms and everywhere in the building were torture and he was very glad when he got out of the building and could just walk back home... but then he heard steps coming after him.

"Hey, Shayne!" he heard familiar voice behind his back and turned towards it to see orange hair and big eyes of his friend, David.

"Oh, hi" he answered, a bit surprised that he didn't sound mad. He actually hasn't seen Lasercorn this day and apparently he was the only person this day that didn't make him angry or irritated in any way. "What's up?"

"Just wanted to let you know, that Sab went with Tyler to her friend for the evening, so I am free for few hours. Wanna go for some beer or something?" he said.

"Actually... Yeah, sure" he said, again surprised that he wanted to. The whole day he wasn't in mood for anything considered a fun or just something he could enjoy, but now he felt like he would really like to go for a drink with his friend.

"Awesome! Want to go now or you got something to do first?" Lasercorn asked.

"Nah, let's go now"

"Perfect! Let's go!"

***

So they were at some bar that they were hanging out in few times before. They were sitting at small round table, drinking a beer and talking. It felt like a relief for the blonde guy after his stressfull day and they were talking about multiple things, but none of them seemed related to Smosh or somebody from the 'Smosh Family'... Until orange haired guy asked him about Tanner's party that he was hosting on Friday that week.

"So, you're coming?" he asked and took a sip of his beer.

"Yeah, I guess... I can't left my twin alone at the party" he joked, reffering to the opinion of the many Smosh members that were saying he and Tanner looked alike.

"I hope so. I will probably disappear around midnight, but usually noone notices" he said.

"Yeah, I guess you're really a pizza ninja"

"Shut up! Don't blow my cover!" David hissed, laughed after that together with Shayne, though. Then he went to the bar for a while to order some salted nuts. "Is Damien coming too?" he asked after he returned with the food.

"Err... I don't know, maybe" Shayne answered, starting to feel a bit uncomfortable again.

"I heard Courtney's coming, so probably he will do as well..." Lasercorn continued slowly, looking at Shayne face. "Emm, Shayne... Just tell me if you don't want to talk about that, but... Are you okay with that?" he asked.

For a while, Shayne stayed silent, trying to think about all of this. It was easier when neither Damien or Courtney weren't anywhere near him. Why do I care, actually?, he thought. Maybe it was just too fast, maybe he was shocked that immadietely he discovered that his best friend started dating someone he knew for some time... Maybe it was only about that.

"I'm not sure. I mean, I don't think that I still have some crush or Courtney or something... I think I just... I don't know. Today Damien asked me to 'cancel' our meeting tommorow because he wanted to gout out with Courtney..." he finally answered.

"You mad at him?"

"No, I don't think so...  I just wasn't prepared for that, I think"

"He didn't tell ya before that he was going for a date with Courtney?" Lasercorn asked, a bit surprised.

"No, he didn't... I think he just wasn't sure if it was going to work out or something. But really, it's nothing, I just was a bit... confused." Shayne said.

"If you say so... Hey, have you heard what Joven didi today a the office?" David said, changing the topic.

"No... What was it?" the blonde asked, smiling again. He was glad that his friend understood that he didn't really want to talk about Damien or Courtney. He just wanted to spend some nice time.

***

And he surely did. Both of them, actually... Though when Lasercorn seemed to be just fine, Shayne definitely drank a bit too much, so the orange haired guy had to help him get back home. They were laughing and talking loudly the whole way, it was past ten and Lasercorn was supposed to be home already, but he didn't seem angry to Shayne.

"Hey, sorry man... You didn't have to walk me here, really" the blonde said after they managd to get to his doors.

"Yeah, I'm sure you would make it alone" David answered sarcastically. "Gotta go now... And you better go to bed, you drunkard" he said and then left him. Shayne managed to open his doors after some time, then went to bathroom and after long while he was sitting on his couch, watching TV and feeling quite dizzy. He wasn't even sure what he was watching, he was actually looking more at the surface, not the screen... But he enjoyed that, actually.

"Hey, what are you watching?" asked Damien, sitting next to him on the couch.

"Wha? How did you get here, man?" Shayne asked confused.

"What do you mean? It's obvious" the brunette answered, smiling at his friend.

"Yes... I guess it is..." he said and for a while they stood silent, watching the surface together. There was some moth flying around the lamp which caught his interest for some time. "But... Whatcha doing here?" he asked all of sudden.

"I'm here for you, buddy" Damien answered, smiling widely. He stod up and walked in front of Shayne. "'m here to help ya relax" he said, quieter and in a way that made him feel a bit weird. He rested his fingers on his waist and started to trail them up his torso, lifting his shirt up slowly, swaying his hips a bit at the same time. After he took it off, he sat on Shayne lap, positioning his knees on both sides of Shayne legs and then leaned for a kiss. It was a long, passionate one, with tongue... At the same time Damien was massaging the blonde's chest, helping him get rid of his clothes as well. After a while they were both shirtless, but it seemed like Damien wanted to take it further. He stood up and started to sway his hips in a slow dance move again and unbuckled his belt slowly and then started to undress... He was left only in his boxers when he kneeled, putting his hands on Shayne's waist.

"Gonna make you relax, buddy" he whispered, pulling his pants and then boxers off. Shayne was fully hard and completely out of his mind. He just watched as Damien grabbed his shaft and started to stroke it slowly. It felt amazing, like something he had never experienced before. His best friend was massaging his dick, he could feel his hot breath on his skin... 

"Just relax. Let it go" the brunette said. And he did, immadietely coming with a loud shout. His vision blurred and when he managed to see again, he saw no one in front of him. he could only see himself naked on his couch, now a bit dirty from his drunken actions.

"Fuck" Shayne whispered to himself.


	8. Maybe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Damien starts to think that it may work out well.

"Nah... It looks too official" Boze said, and Damien sighed again. "What? You wanted my advice so I gave you one" she explained herself. "You look better in the red one, I tell you".

"Which one? The stripped one or plain? And you sure about the blue one?" he asked and for a moment he thought that the girl was going to yell at him when he saw her face on the screen. She was advicing him for around fifteen minutes after he asked Wes and Flitz the same. He had a date with Courntey in two hours and he was pretty nervous - this one wasn't just casual meeting in a coffee shop, but more classy one, in a restaruant. Not very expensive one, he wasn't going to wear a suit or something, but still, he wanted to look nice. Wes and Flitz gave him some advices through the Skype, and now he called Boze... usually he would ask Shayne and probably be satisfied with his answer, but now he felt like he shouldn't. His best friends seemed to be not really in a mood since Damien told him about his date with Courtney. The brunette really hoped it was just a coincidence, because he liked the blonde girl and wanted to try more dates with her... but he didn't want to lose his best friend that way.

"No, I tell you, blue is not your color. Just get the red tie" she said.

"But what the shirt? Plain black one or the dark-blue? I have also dark grey one with the pattern" he asked.

"Black one... Or the gray, as you want" she answered and it was definitely a mistake.

"So which one? I like the grey one too, but I wore something grey on our previous date, I think I should wear something different... But the black one is, I don't know, does it go well with the red?"

Boze gave him a deadly look, but had to give up when she saw Damien's puppy eyes and the helpless look on his face. "Just put it on and I will tell ya" she told him, which made him smile a bit.

"Thanks. Give me a minute" he said and then took few steps back to take off his light blue shirt and put the red tie and the red and black plain shirt on. Then he stepped back to show his outfit to the girl.

"Perfect, go get her, dog!" she said quickly and showe him thumbs up.

"And what about the pants and..."

"Can't hear ya, something's broke, bye!" he shouted and left. Damien sighed a bit, but when he looked at himself at the mirror he seemed fine to himself. I guess that's it, he thought.

***

"...and we kissed and left, but some girls were still following us with their phones" Courtney finished the story about she and Keith pretended the proposal at the Disneyland.

"Wow... Err, that's seemed funny" he answered, feeling a bit awkward. THey were on a date and she was telling him the story about faking proposal with other guy he knew... Yeah, pretty awkward.

"Or, sorry... BUt don't worry. I think he's gay, actually. I think he's really hitting on Noah" she started to explain and Damien laughed.

"No, it's nothing... But, really? I thought they're just good friends" he said, a bit confused.

"Oh, maybe... But you know, it's sometimes hard to tell in that kind of relation. I mean, the fact that they're best friends doesn't mean that one of them is not gay for the other, right? It may be just like they're hiding it" she told him. And it made him silent for a while. They already finished their main meals, now they were only drinking wine and waiting for the dessert. Courtney looked very beautiful this evening in her green dress. He hadn't seen her in green before and wouldn't think she would look that good in it, he had to admit that.

"What?" she asked, surprising him a bit. After a while he realized he was staring at her maybe in not so polite way.

"Oh, sorry, really... It's just, err... I like the colour of your dress, it fits you well" he explained, blushing a bit.

"Thanks. I must say you look pretty fine with the balck and red combination too" she answered, making him blush even more. Then waiter interrupted them, bringing the dessert they ate together, still talking.

After about half an hour, they decided to leave the restaurant. Damien wanted to take Courtney for a walk with a surprise and the girl seemed to be exited at the idea. So, again, she went to the bathroom and he paid for their meal. When she returned, they went to the park, just strolling slowly, enjoying the warm night and talking about the stars again. This night they were even more visible, espiecially at the park.

"I hope that this surprise is worth it, cause the view is great" Courtney joked, pointing at the sky.

"Guess you'll have to find out..." he said, and turned to face her, then bowed nicely and reached his hand in a gentle way. "May I lead you?" he asked in a charming voice, which made her blush.

"Gladly" she answered and accepted his grip. So he leaded her slowly out of the park. He had to be very careful, because though he wore his contacts, he still had very bad sight at night, but somehow he made it to leave the place without falling on the ground. Then they walked through the streets for few minutes until they got in front of a...

"Library? Are you going to read me a poem?" she asked, laughing a bit, though the idea sounded interesting to her.

"Or maybe something better. You'lle see" he answered and led her further... but no to the door. Actually it seemed like the building was closed, all the lights were out which wasn't surprising - it was pretty late at the time.

"Isn't it closed?" she asked, even more confused but also interested.

"Not really... It would be hard since it closed" he joked leading her around the building.

"Yup, I can see that... But maybe you know some secret passages" she joked again and then they stopped. She saw metal spiral stairway at the side of the building, leading to the top of it.

"Well, kinda... It's not really a secret, though" he answered with a grin and then let her to go first "Please watch your steps. If I made you twist your ankle at the second date I would be a terrible boyf-" he added, and then coughed immadietely after he realized what he was going to say. After a short moment of nervous chuckling and coughing, he finished the sentence: "I would be a really not gentle man". He could swear he heard the blonde girl giggle quietly at him.

But when they reached the top, she definetely wasn't giggling. From there they both could see the sky so well it seemed almost impossible in a city big like LA. For a while, she was only looking at the moon and all of the stars in awe and amusement... and then she looked at Damien.

"How... How did you find that place?" she asked, stuttering a bit.

"Like a week ago or something... Beautiful, isn't it?" he answered, moving a bit closer to her. She didn't responded, at least not with words. She just leaned to him, resting her head on his shoulder and grabbing his hand.

"It's perfect" she whispered, looking into his eyes.

"Not yet" he said and before she could answer, he placed a soft kiss on her lips. And when he leaned back, she stopped him, putting her hand on the back of his neck and payed him back with another kiss. More passionate one, that was for sure.

"So... I guess I can say that I am a gentleman? Your ankles's fine, right?" he asked after they broke the kiss, which made the blonde girl laugh. He liked her even more when she was laughing or smiling... she seemed like a pure happines then. Something which always seemed imposible to feel for him... But at this moment he was feeling like it was actually posibble for him to be happy with a girl, to be in a happy relationship. Maybe I can do it... Maybe we can do it, he thought.

"Yes, I think it's alright" she answered and they kissed once again.


	9. Move Over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, 200 hits! That's nice, thank you for reading my work.

"Ah, come on! Are you already tired!?" the brunette was shouting from somewhere in front of him, he couldn't see from where exactly. Shayne was pretty amazed by Damien - the guy was almost blind in the dark and still managed to get away with the blunt... And speaking of the blunt, Shayne could feel the effects of smoking it combined with the alcohol much harder now. They both din't smoke or drink much and it wasn't their first time, but it still made it more difficult. His vision was blurred, his sight was then probably just as bad as Damien's... which might had been the cause of brunette's advantage. He was kinda accustomed to the dark, and Shayne didn't... But he had a plan how to catch his friend.

"Wait! Oh, crap..." he shouted a bit quieter, as if he was much more exhausted than he actually was. He stopped and bended a little, so he could hide behind the bush. He could hear Damien's steps slowing down - the brunette also stopped.

"Shayne?" he asked loudly, sounding a bit worried. Shayne grinned, trying not to burst into laughter - his plan was working. So he just groaned lightly, but loud enough for Daien to hear it. "Shayne!? Are you okay?" Damien shouted again. He could hear him running towards him. "Say something, I can't find you!"

"I'm here!" Shayne shouted back, and the nslowly started moving, still bowed a bit and watching his steps so he wouldn't make any noise.

"Where? What happened? Are you hurt!?" Damien sounded almost terrified, which made the other boiy a bit guilty... not enough to stop.

"No, I think I just..." he started, hiding behind the tree. He could see the dark figure walking towards the bush he was hiding in before. So he quickly humped towards him, pushing Damien and pinning him to the ground. "I think I just euchred ya" he finished the sentence, laying on Damien's back and laughing. After a while brunette also started to laugh and tried to free himself from his friend's grip, but this time Shayne made sure to not let him do that, so he managed to stay on the top of his buddy. When he was shoved to the ground, Damien dropped the blunt in the mud, but it seemed like none of them cared about it anymore.

"Yeah, I guess you did" boy below him said, after he stopped laughing as well as squirming.

"Really? You admit that?" Shayne asked, a bit surprised that his friend surrended so easily.

"Yes. I will admit..." he started, and then with one hard motion of his whole body he throwed his friend off of his body and then pinned him to the ground just as his 'rival' did before to him. "...that you're easy to distract" he added and they both started to laugh again. They rolled around the ground again until they felt that they were so covered in dirt and mud that it was hard to even get a grip on the other.

"Geez... I feel so moist" Damien said.

"Yeah, that's probably because you're all in mud" Shayne responded sarcastically.

"You don't say" the brunette answered and got up on his feet and then helped to other to stand up. Then they walked further into the trees in another random direction, not really thinking about how to get to the house or to their friends. But, surprisingly, they somehow made it to the lake's shore... It wasn't the same part which was close to the lake, it was for sure. But still, it was something familliar.

"That's not bad... We can just go side to the shore and we should find the house... I think" Shayne said.

"Yeah, I guess it sounds smart... BUt don't you think we should wash ourselves before?" Damien said, walking towards the water.

"I would love too, but if you forgot, we left our swimming suits at the house" the shorter boy said. But his friend was still getting closer to the water. It was a nice part of shore cause there was no reed or cane, only a small beach and even a very useful fallen tree, that seemed not rotted yet, so it could be used as a deck or platform to jump in to the water from.

"So what?' Damien asked and pulled his dirty shirt off, revealing his quite defined, for a teenager, chest, also covered in dirt and mud a bit. But he didn't stopped on the torso - then he took off his shoes, his socks, pants... He threwed his colthes on the fallen tree so they wouldn't get even more dirty. "What? You're coming or not?" he asked, looking at Shayne, he froze few steps away, staring at his friend with shocked gaze. Well, he had seen Damien's body before, but this time it felt.. different. Maybe it was because of the alcohol and weed, maybe because of the scenery, and maybe because this time, when it was covered in sweat and dirt, it looked just so much not like the boy he knew...

"Well, do as you want, I don't like to stay dirty like that" brunette said and with those words, he pulled the last article of clothing off - his boxers. Then he just casually stepped on the top of the fallen limb and walked to the end of it. He stood there for a while, looking at the sky, and at that moment, Shayne was just charmed. He could see this skin in the moonlight, those dirty, wet dark hair, so messed up at the moment, those defined muscles on his arms, his back, legs... his butt. And then, he bended his legs a bit, raised his arms, and jumped to the water in move o perfect, that Shayne would like to see it again at least hundred times. The sound of splashing water awakened him from his day-dreaming, and then Shayne runned towards the water, getting rid of all of his clothes as fast as he had never before. He got into the end of the tree and saw his friend's head appearing on the surface. Damien smiled to him encouragely, looking into his eyes. And Shayne jumped.

Water was much warmer than he thought it would be, though, still, it wasn't a hot tub. Though, it felt nice and refreshing, he definetely needed it after running through the forest with his friend and then rolling and squirming in the mud with him... And when he bobed out to the surface and saw his friend grin, he enjoyed it even more.

"So? It was a good idea, wasn't it?" Damien asked, swimming a bit closer to him.

"Yeah, I guess..." Shayne admitted, a bit shyly. Maybe he was drunk, but he still felt a bit awkward about the idea of swimming with Damien naked... or maybe he felt like that  _because_ he was drunk. Usually the idea of seeing his friend naked wouldn't probably seem that awkward for him.

"You guess? Well, I  _guess_ you are so afraid to admit it, that I have to make you do it!" the brunette said and grabbed Shayne in the water, splashing the water around them and trying to lower his friend so he would sink a bit into the water. But Shayne didn't give up so easily, so they started to wrestle in the water. It probably wasn't the best idea since both of them were a litle drunk, but they didn't care at the moment. They were good swimmers, so they made it not to die, so far at least.

"Alright, alright, it was a great idea, I love it!" the shorter boy said, laughing.

"Well, then I'm glad you did... Will I get a reward?" he asked, grinning.

"What kind of?" Shayne asked, sounding very confused. Then Damien turned his back to him and pointed his neck, which was still a bit dirty.

"Can you please wash my neck? I feel it is still not clean" he said, laughing a bit. He sounded serious, though.

"Sure, man, I got ya" Shayne answered after a while and started to rub his friend's neck, trying to wash the dirt off of it. "Done" he added after a while.

"Thanks, buddy" the brunette said, turning and facing him again. Shayne could see now that his forehead was a bit dirty too.

"Wait a second" he said quietly and started to wash his friend face, softly rubbing his fingers and palm on his head. "Close your eyes, please" he added and then touched Damien's eyelids softly. he wasn't sure if they were really dirty... But he just felt like he wanted to touch them.

"Thanks, man" the brunette said, opening his eyes and then chuckled a bit awkwardly. Shayne wasn't sure because it was pretty dark, but he could swear that he saw a blush on his cheeks. His face was red too, so he didn't say anything.

"Anything and everything for a satisfied customer" he joked and they both laughed a bit.

"Then I would like to pay you for your service" the taller boy said softly and placed his hands on Shayne's shoulders and chest, washing it from the mud and dirt. They were both just smilind and chuckling, looking into each other's eyes. Then Damien trailed his fingers a bit above, to hisfriend's jaw and then he placed his thumbs on his lips. Damien's skin felt so nice against his mouth, he had to really keep himself from opening it a bit, which was harder after a joint and alcohol.

"Whoa! What are you guys doing?" they heard a familliar voice and then turned to the shore. Somehow they didn't heard they steps before and now mostly all of their friends were there, looking at them as they were taking a naked bath in the lake, together, so close to each other... touching each other...

"Just washing. We were dirty... We couldn't find you guys in the forest. Where have you been?" Damien responded quickly, getting his hands away from his friend slowly.

"Yeah..." Shayne added quietly, swimming a bit away from the brunette.

"You know, we didn't want to interrupt your date, guys" one of their friend joked and everybody laughed, except Shayne. They both got a little bit closer to the shore, still not getting out off water fully, though.

"So why are you interrupting now?" Damien asked, still laughing a bit and pulling Shayne closer to him, grabbing him by the shoulder like he was his boyfriend. It was obviusly a joke and everybody laughed... except Shayne, again. He felt weird, he felt wrong, he felt like everyone was judging him, staring at him... He got out of Damien's grip fast and moved few steps away from him.

"Hey, babe, what's going on?" Damien said, keeping the joke and the rest of thegroup laughed again. They were clearly just playing around, having fun, but Shayne just feld mad. And when Damien moved closer to him, reaching for a hug, he pushed him away.

"Leave me alone, you perv!" he shouted. The brunette fell into the water, it seemed like Shayne pushed him much harder than he wanted to. He actually hit him in the chest, pushing his best friend into the water pretty hard. It didn't seem dangerous though, so the team just laughed again.

"Okay, lovebirds, we will leave ya here. After you done, get back to the house, we have a beef to roast" someone shouted and all of them slowly dissapered behind the trees again. Damien looked at him in a weird way, and Shayne stared at him terrified.

"Jesus, Damien, I'm sorry, I didn't want to..." he started, moving closer to the taller boy, but then his friend just moved away.

"No. Now  _you_ leave me alone" he answered shortly and turned away from Shayne.

"Please, I really didn't mean to..." he tried to speak again, but Damien clearly didn't care.

"Shut up and go with them. I will get to the house by myself" he said, still not facing the other boy. A single tear dropped on Shayne's cheek, it was not really visible, though, he was pretty wet on all of his body. He slowly got out from the water and got dressed. His clothes were wet and dirty, but he felt like it was at least accurate to his mood and his opinion about himself.

"Damien, I..." he tried for the third time but then the brunette just dived into the water, not listening to him. So he just walked into the forest again. But he didn't walk with the rest of the group. He didn't want the mto see him cry.

***

"Hey, your turn, man!" male voice remined him and Shayne shooked his head. he was in a bar, it was Thursday night... It was the place and the time where and when he would usually play the pool with Damien. But he was on a date with his new girlfriend, so Shayne was just supposed to stay at home for the evening and do somethin else. It wasn't the first time to call of their meeting, so it didn't seem like a big deal... but apparently it was. Shayne just felt so mad and angery, not really at Damien or Courtney, more at himself. He decided to go to the bar and play, with or withour his best friend. he met some random dude who looked about his age, he was a bit taller, with shor black hair. He seemed nice and also was alone at the bar so they played together. It wasn't very exiting game, but they kept on playing few more until it was almost 11 PM.

"Yeah, sorry, I got distracted" Shayne answered and walked to the table to play his turn.

"You seem to be easy to distract, man" the guy said. THe blonde forgot his name again but he didn't really care. Usually he would feel terrible if he treated someone like that, but now he was mad, tired and irritated at everything... so yeah, he didn't care about the guy's name and just kept calling him 'dude' or 'man' all the time.

"Yeah, I guess i Heard it before" he answered, focusing on the table and the game. He hitted the last ball, the last one - and won the game, second time in a row - though he had lost previous two games.

"Wow... I guess it was just bad luck before" admitted the guy, smiling at him.

"Or now it's just good luck" Shayne responded and then yawned a bit "I think I'm done for tonight... Thanks for the game, man" he said, shaked the guy's hand and went to the bathroom before he left the bar. After he used it, he walked to the sink to wash his hands and when he almost left the room, he saw his new 'friend' in front of him.

"Oh, hello. Nice to see you again" he said, smiling.

'Yeah, I guess so" Shayne answered, trying to sound not so mad. This dude really seemed like a nice guy, he didn't want to be rude to him.

"You seem stressed out, dude... Can I help you?" he asked, still not moving away.

"Not really, thanks..."

"Are you sure? I can offer a really good support..." the guy continued, grinning even more. Shayne laughed a bit, pretty confused.

"Wow, really? What kind of support can I get from a guy I just met?" he said.

"The best kind" the guy whispered and pushed the blonde a bit, so he rested his back on the doors of one of the cabin's. The guy touched his crotch, rubbing it through the pants and leaned for a kiss. But before their lips met, Shayne pushed him away - gently, actually. The guy looked at him confused.

"No... Thanks, man" the blonde said.

"Sorry, I thought you were..." the guy started, sounding a bit embarassed, but before he finished, Shayne spoke again.

"I get it. I forgive you... And now, goodbye" he said and then left the bathroom and the bar and headed to his house with dark thoughts in his mind.


	10. To Love Somebody

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything seems fine, but she still doubts it.

Courtney was laughing at another of Damien's joke, again too loud and people in the coffee looked at her irritated. She tried to calm herself down a bit, but it was hard. She was really in a great mood, thanks to the man next to her. He gave her another grin and this look in his brown eyes... it just made her crack again and almost choke because of lack of air.

"Wow... That was one of the greatest laughters I've heard so far" the brunette admitted as if he wa some kind of laughter critic.

"Oh, really? Who's got the best one?" she asked, still giggling a little.

"Shayne. Sorry, sweetheart, but I have to be brutally honest in this profession. No one can beat Shayne's laugh" he said, still sounding very serious, which would made her laugh again if she didn't cover her mouth.

"Alright, let's get outta here before they kick me out" she said, still trying her best no to laugh. The man agreed and they both left the caffee shop and decided to take a walk before returning to the office. They were on their lunch break, but already ate and drank at the shop, so they had about twenty minutes left.

"Tonight's there's a party at Tanner's... You're coming?" she asked him.

"I don't know, probably not... I was supposed to talk with my mother in the evening" he answered, a bit embarassed.

"She's in LA now?" she asked surprised. She thought Damien's mom lived somewhere else.

"No, she's in Germany for next two weeks. You know, she went for a trip for her vacation... She doesn't have a lot of occasions to call me so and usually, you know... We talk for longer than five minutes" he said, still embarassed, which almost made her laugh again. Damien was even cuter liked that, at least for her.

"Don't be shy, I won't laugh at you or anything... I also spend a lot of time talking to my family at home" she told him, trying to encourage him a bit. He smiled softly, though still looked a bit awkward.

"But, you know... It's usually different when it comes to guys... I have nothing against showing emotions and close relations with your parents when you're adult, but some people would judge me for calling my mum so often... Cause I do it quite often" he continued, blushing a bit.

"Well, you can trust me that I'm not one of these people" she said and kissed him lightly on the cheek, which made his smile wider. "So... you're not coming then?" she asked.

"I mean, I can come if you want me to... I can call my mother other day, it's not really that big deal. If you want me to come with you." he started, sounding a bit stressed again.

"I would love to see you there, but you don't have to... I won't be mad if you want to stay at home and talk with your mother" she said, trying to calm him down but it seemed like he wasn't convinced at all.

"Alright, I will come then" he spoke after a while, sounding a bit weird though. She stood in front of him, stopping him.

"Damien... I meant it. It wasn't any teast or tricky question... It's not like you have to be with me all the time because we're dating" she assured him, and then bit her lip. She realized that it might had sounded not as she wanted to... And when she looked at Damien's face, she was sure he understood it the wrong way.

"But I want to spend the time with you. I want to go with you to the party" he said, sounding very honest.

"Oh God, I said it wrong again..." she laughed a bit and then looked into Damien's eyes. She looked so innocent she had to hug him. So she did, and he hugged back, smiling.

"So what did you mean?" he asked, confused.

"I meant that I can go to the party alone. I really won't be mad at you. I would enjoy your company, but if you didn't come, I wouldn't feel lonely and sad... Which does not mean that I don't want you there with me... I mean, just stay and talk with your mother. It's not the only party we can go to together, right?" she tried once again and it seemed that this time he understood what she meant.

"Alright... So I think I have an idea that will satisfy us both" he said and she smiled. THey were stil hugging, as she realized... But none of them cared, so they just kept it that way.

"Okay, so let's hear it" she whispered to his ear softly.

"I will drive you to Tanner's house and spend some time with you there... Though, I won't drink anything so I can return to my place and call my mum and talk with her... And I don't think that I will have to drink because of the conversation with her, so I can actually drive for you back and get you to your place after the party... If you want to, of course" he spoke and she nodded, smiling.

"Sounds perfect... Though maybe I will sleep at Olivia's apartament, she lives near Tanner, so you may not need to drive me back... But we will see about that, okay? I will call you" she answered. THey both 'signed' their agreement with a soft kiss and then returned to their strolling until they got to the building where their office was located. And they both entered it, holding hands and smiling happily.

She definitely liked this feeling.

***

They were driving in Damien's car for the party, listening to the music on the radio and holding hands. She was looking at the brunette as he was trying to focus on the road instead of her, which seemed like a challenge for him. She was smiling softly, though her thoughts were not so bright... She felt happy with this man. She really did... But still, she felt like he just wasn't right for her. Like they should be best buddies and all, but not really partners... He could made her laugh and vice versa, they could talk for hours but also stay silent together, just looking at the sky at nights or a day too, actually. His touch made her feel warm and safe, his smile could light her mood up any time... but she felt like she just couldn't say she loved him.

But what does it mean to love?, she thought. Maybe it just comes after some time... Maybe I should wait. Stay with him, wait to see what happens... But what if nothing?

She didn't want to hurt the man. She couldn't think of that... but what if she had no choice? if she didn't love him, she shouldn't lie to him. But she shouldn't also just break up with him just because she wasn't sure... So for now I'm fine, but what about the future?, she thought. She had to think about that too... And she wasn't sure.

"Okay... So I think that's the place" Damien told her after they drived to the nice house she recognized easily. Few familiar cars were parked here, so it definetely was the right building. Well, seems I have to think about that later. I won't spoil the fun just because I'm not sure at the moment, she thought and looked at the guy next to her. She knew that his smile could make her smile too... And it worked out perfectly, just as she wanted to.

"You weren't here before?" she asked surprised.

"No, I'm not really a party animal" he answered, laughing a bit. He parked the car and it was 20:56 as she checked the hour on her phone. Damien also saw that and smirked a bit, looking at her.

"What?" she asked, liking this kind of smile on the brunette's face.

"Well... We were supposed to arrive on 9. I don't like to lie to my friends, and Tanner is definitely one of them... So we should wait those four minutes" he suggested in a voice she hadn't heard from him before. But she liked it.

"I hope then you have some idea how to spend them, then?" she answered and the man leaned towards her in a response. They kissed in a passionate way, very emotional also. They made out like that on the front seats of Damien's car, which was definetely a different kind of activity compared to looking at the sky and taking slow walks together...

After they pulled of, Courtney looked at the guy quite amazed. "Well... I guess I didn't know that part of you before, Damien" she said, looking into those exited big eyes and the grin below them.

"And? Did you like it?" he asked, still grinning.

"It seems nice" she answered and looked at her phone again. They had one minute before the right hour. "Shall we?" she asked.

"As you want, m'lady" he responded and left the car and then walked to her doors to open it before her. They walked to the doors, knocked and Tanner opened them exactly when 21:00 appeared on the clock.

"Hi, guys, come in!" the guy greeted them and they walked inside. They greeted also other people they saw in the living room - Mari, Wes, Olivia, Joven and Flitz. Then, on the corridor, they met Joe and Sarah, finally also Ian at the entrance to the kitchen, where they saw the last person in the house.

"Hi Shayne, good to see you!"


	11. What Good Can Drinkin' Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SHayne finds a solution. Kind of.

It was almost 8 PM but Shayne still was just in his boxers, staring at the TV, thoughtless. TV wasn't even turned on, which made it even sadder... He was sitting in silence for almost half hour. Hour before decided to go to the Tanner's party, though he didn't want to before. He felt determined to get a shower, get dressed nicely and go, not caring about Damien and Courtney... well, he failed, cause after he got out of the shower, he saw the message from Damien. His friend was asking him if he was coming to the party, and told him that he will arrive for a while with Courtney... The blonde could easily predict that, it should be quite obvius that since the brunhette was dating the girl they will come together. Though when his friend confirmed that, it just destroyed him. He layed on a couch, then sat on it, wet and only in his boxers.

"Oh, fuck it, I don't go" he whispered and layed on the couch again, hiding his face in the pillow. He was just tired, tired of everything that happened in those days... Why is this happening to me? Will I get better?, he was asking himself. But he didn't know the answer.

He thought about the game of pool he played the evening before with that stranger. He forgot his name again, he didn't really remember what did he look like, though he didn't care. When the man tried to kiss him in the bathroom, Shayne felt something... Something he had felt before, but not that strong. He was aroused because of a guy. That probably meant he wasn;t as straight as he thought... Memory of that reminded him about this one weird dream about Damien he had, and then, when he got drunk with Lasercorn, he also had some strange thoughts... He couldn't remember what they were exactly, but the memory of them made him feel kinda weird... and guilty, again.

No shit, I'm not gay... I would find out before if i was, he thought. "Screw it, I'm going" he decided. He needed a bit of encouragement first. He went to the kitchen and poured a little of whisky to the glass and then drank it slowly. He tried to clear his mind a bit, and alcohol seemed to help him do that... at least for a while, because after he finished his drink, he got stressed again. Everything just seemed to have a meening that he hadn't think of never before. Everything seemed to be connected with Damien and his opinion about Shayne... He really didn't want to lose his best friend. he felt scared... and lonely. He poured himself whisky again, but this time he drank it much faster. Maybe even a bit too fast... It made him fell better, though, so he went to his room to get dressed.

***

He lived very close to Tanner, so he didn't use a car, just walked to the party and appeared at the place about 20:30. He was in nice checked blue, red and white flanel shirt and some jeans, nothing too special, he looked nice, though. Even a little bit more than usual. He talked for a while with everyone that arrived before him and of course with Tanner, and he felt like he was even not that mad at everything anymore. he went to the kitchen to grab something to drink for himself and Olivia, who was waiting for him in the living room. No one so far noticed that he had drank before, it was a good sign. He really feeled better that way... not so stressed. So when was ready to return the his friend with a glass of wine for her, and himself too, of course, he heard steps behind him and the familliar voice.

"Hi Shayne, good to see you" Courtney greeted him as he turned slowly to face her and the man following her. When she came closer to hug him, he quickly put back the glasses on the table so he could hug her back. And for some reason he felt determined to look at her, not his best friend. Only after the girl stepped back, he looked at brunette's face and smiled. It was a little forced smile and when he realized that, he felt so awful about himself. Why am I like this to him? Just because he's happy, he thought.

"Hey, dude, I thought I won't see you here, you didn't respond me... You didn't see my message?" Damien said after he came closer. It seemed like he was going for a hug, so Shayne grabbed glasses of wine again. He made it look very normal, so Damien just sepped but and it didn't seem like he felt rejected. he just patted the blonde on the back with smile, and he smiled back, though he was feeling even worse with every second spent with those two people. He saw that Damien's was wearing also a flanel shirt, red and black though and with dark green t-shirt under it... he looked very good. And it made him feel bad.

"Nice to see you too guys... Sorry, I didn't see it... I gotta return to Olivia, but you can catch me later" he answered quickly and left the kitchen. He drank half of his glass before he reached the living room.

***

He was sitting on the couch and looking at his friend dancing. It wasn't a big party, only people from work appeared... It was very nice, actually, it made them feel closer and more friendly in the whole team. Everyone that was supposed to arrive already arrived, so the party was fully on. Joven somehow made it to take control of the musc for a while and he played Britney Spears songs, ironically, as he explained himself, though no one believed him. No one also card, and people started to dance. Shayne also danced once with Boze, but only because she asked him to and after one song he returned to the couch and now was looking as she, Mari, Olivia and Noah were killing it on the dance floor, clearly making fun of the pop song, but also it seemed like they were really enjoying it. Shayne was smiling a bit at the sight of it, though he refused to dance again. Mostly because in that position he couldn't see Damien dancing with Courtney on the other side of the room. He didn't want to look at that. he knew it would hurt it.

Maybe i still have feelings for her, he thought, trying to find out what was going on with him. She's beautiful, funny, always ready to help and make her friends happy... It's obvious I like her. But how much I do? Am I jealous?, he was still thinking. The song ended and everyone looked at Joven, waiting for more.

"Okay, now something for real.." he shouted in defense, "No more Britney!" he promised. But to Shayne's surprise, the group seemed sad about that.

"Ah, come on! One more!" Olivia said and mostly everyone nodded, and then laughed, so Joshua played Britney once more.

"But this is the last!" he shouted, but no one listened to him.

Shayne laughed a bit and when Noah walked to him to make him dance, he almost fell... But then he saw Damien and Courtney moving to the door. It seemed like the brunette was leaving.

"Sorry, dude, maybe later" he said to the younger guy and then walked to his best friend. "Hey, man, you're leaving already?" he asked. Then he remembered the text he got earlier... Damien said it before that he will come only for a while. And though his company made Shayne feel bad, he didn't want him to leave.

"Yeah, I have to... But Courtney's staying" he answered, and then looked at the girl "You see? You have someone to dance with instead of me!" he added, grinning. 

"Well, I hope so" she joked, looking at the blonde guy with a smile. Damien shouted goodbyes to everyone and then left. before Shayne could react, Courtney grabbed his hand and took him to the centre of the living room. "C'mon!" she said, laughing and shaking his hand to make him move faster.

He looked at her surprised... She was on shorts and normal white shirt, nothing special, but she still looked great. What's so special about her? Why Damien likes her so much?, he thought, looking at her, amuzed. 

'What are you staring at! Move!" she reminded him, laughing. he saw her white teeth when she smiled... Is it about that smile? It's really pretty, the thought.

"Nothing" he responded shortly and started to dance with her And after the song ended, they danced for another, and then again, and again. Sometimes they danced also with other people, with Olivia or Noah for example, but mostly all the time Shayne was looking at Courtney, admiring the view and smiling joyfully. It seemed like few of his friends saw that and looked a bit weird at his behaviour... But he wasn't doing anything wrong, right? He was just having fun with his friend. And who cared if she was dating Damien or not... They were just dancing.

***

It was almost midnight and he was pretty drunk, just as Courtney. He had to help her walk sometimes, but he had nothing against it and she seemed to just have fun as well. Some of the people also already left - Damien and David were first to leave, as usual, but other people followed them soon. Courtney said something to the blonde guy about her staying at Olivia's apartament for the night, so she was supposed to stay close to her. But Shayne assured her, that they will find her when they will need to and then they both walked to the garden. They needed fresh air.

"What a great party, right?" she said, giggling still a bit. SHayne just nodded and they both stood outside, silent. The girl was looking at the sky, looking so calm and peaceful. How you can be that calm, he thought. It was always hard for him to calm himself when he needed it... But now, with her, he felt just good.

"Beautiful, aren't they?' she whispered, looking at the sky.

"Yeah... Beautiful" he answered quietly, not taking even a quick glance at the sky, though. He was looking only at the girl, her face, her hair...

"It's new moon. It's the best view now... I hope Damien can see that in his house" she added.

"Right... I hope so too" he said. When he heard his best friend name, he shivered a bit... But he managed to get his out of his mind fast. Being drunk helped in that. "Hey... Wanna take a walk?" he asked her. She turned to him and smiled softly.

"Sure, why not" she responded and they left the garden.


	12. Down On Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Courtney's down on herself. And everything and everyone else... so she just lets the alcohol do its thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Probably this song's title has even less to do with the chapter than usual, but I used it because the first time I heard it (my english was even shittier then than nowadays) I thought it was about something else, I didn't get the title...  
> So, here it is.  
> *warning* again. if you had read the previous chapter, you know why

Two people were walking clunky on the street. The blonde woman was giggling and laughing all the way, helded by her blond friend, because otherwise she would defintely had fallen on the asphalt already. But one time, when the man said some random thing about the red car they passed, for some reason the girl just laughed so hard she slipped from his hands and fell on the ground, still laughing. THe guy crouched side to her, looking a bit worried, but smilling a little too.

"Are you alright?" Shayne asked, worried. He's so sweet that way, she thought. And he really was... Though she probably shouldn't admit that. ot in that way... She was kinda in a relationship. Well, maybe not really yet, but almost. She had been on two dates with Damien and they both seemed ready for another one... They really liked each other. And that was one of the problems. She felt like their friendship was too good to risk it by taking it further. Beside her happy and smiley way of being, she always thought of herself as not very valuable person. If she was in a relationship with the brunette, she would have to show him her true self... And she didn't like the idea. It seemed like her happy side was better for him, helping him relax and be happy himself... She didn't want to ruin that by revealing her problems and weaknesses. At the same time she was so tired of hiding her problems from people. Well, she didn't hide it from all of them, but most. It sucked... but she couldn't live other way. At least she thought so.

"I'm fine, I'm fine..." she assured him, though he was still looking worried, so she laughed at the sight of his face. "You should see your face... Goddammit, Shayne!" she told him, and he smiled wider. Then he stood up and reached a hand to help her do the same. She grabbed his arm and got on her feet. She felt really well, so she was ready continue their walk, but Shayne stopped her.

"Courtney, you're hurt..." he said, ponting at her knee. It was a bit red, she probably brushed it a bit, but it didn't seem like anything serious. Even when she saw a little streak of blood coming from it.

"It's nothing, I'll clean it at Tanner's bathroom... We should get back, Olivia's probably waiting for me there" she said.

"No... It may be serious. You're drunk, you may just not feel it yet... Come to my place, it's right over there... I have some bandages" he refused, ponting at the house near them. She felt kinda confused... did they walked so far or was Shayne living so close? She didn't know.

"Really, it's nothing... C'mon, let's go back to the party" she also resisted. "Olivia's going to worry about me" she added.

"Then text her that you will sleep at my place" he answered, and she looked at him confused a bit. "Just c'mon, I will make bed for you, I have free guest room there".

***

Despite his promises, no one used the bed at the guest room. Neither the couch or the carpet... Although, doors to Shayne's bedroom slammed, as the blonde guy kicked them open. He walked in... or maybe  _moved_ in, because it was hard to call that walking. He and Courtney were tangled in each others embraces, kissing with passion, rubbing their bodies against the other, trailing hands alongside them.

The guy was pushed to the wall as the girl, still kissing him, started to unbutton his shirt, pretty fast for someone who drank this much. The guy, slipping the tongue in their kiss, was lifting her shirt up, massaging her back, her stomach, her breasts through the bra. She finally got rid of his flanel and started to trail kisses from his neck to his chest, rubbing his pecs, biceps, his muscled shoulders. His skin felt so hot against her fingers, and his hands were making her tremble like she hadn't for a really long time. They were much different from Damien's touches... Even when she kissed the brunette on the top of the library this one night... he was much softer, more delicate, gentle. Even when they kissed passionately in his car, it didn't have that risky, dangerous hot feeling. It was beautiful, romantic... It was sweet and lovely, made her feel special... But also not worth it. Not valuable enough for this... And at this moment, when she was with Shayne, she just enjoyed his touches, his body pressed to her, his kisses and his breath on her neck. She needed to feel the lust, to be that aroused. She just needed it.

When she felt Shayne's skilled fingers working her bra, all the thoughts about her relationship and Damien left her head. She felt as her bra falls on the floor, soon followed by her shirt. Shayne rested his big hands on hear breasts, circling his fingers around her nipples, kissing their skin, resting his face on them. She moaned into his ear and kisses his messy hair as her hands went down. One landed in his abs, feeling their perfection, feeleing the heat of those strong muscles, as the other trailed to his back, touching lightly his spine... at frist. Then it also moved lower, as her fingers slipped inside Shayne's jeans to touch his muscled butt. She could hear him chuckle a bit, as he also trailed his hands from her boobs to her ass, massaging it through the shorts and then grabbing it and lifting her up. She tangled her legs around his hips as he carried her towards the bed, where they landed together, kissing again.

She hated herself so much at this moment. She felt dirty, wrong, evil... and she wanted it to keep going. As is cheating on Damien with his best friend would just prove that she was right about herself-  she was a bad person, someone not worth man such great as Damien. This might not be the best logic, but she couldn't think any better... The alcohol, her mood and her lust made it impossible to think straight. So she just kissed Shayne back even harder.

As she was laying on her back, the blonde started to go down her torso, leaving kisses and sucking her skin from the neck to the stomach, as he was touching his hair, his ears, his shoulders and gasping because of the sensation she felt. She was admiring the perfect body of her lover, it like ancient sculpture with bones, muscles... But it wasn't only about that. Also his lips, his nose, his cheekbones, hir glorious messy bright hair... Then she tried to looked into his eyes to admire her favourite part of every person. She always thought that the eyes could reveal the truth about everyone.

And Shayne's eyes were closed. His lids were not just softly lowered as if he just wanted to feel her with other senses. They were tightened hard, as if he was focusing on something... He probably felt change in her behaviour, she stopped her moves. He looked up and opened his eyes... they looked a bit red, as if he was about to cry. But then he smirked, and the sad faded away. His face looked just damn handsome again. He trailed his kisses even lower as he was pushing her shorts down, leaving her only in her panties. He looked at her with pert smile and she just nodded, as he slipped his fingers inside, touching her lightly.

Courtney moaned loudly. She hadn't feel a man down there for a while... She almost forgot how great it felt to have a lover. She grabbed his hair tight with one hand, while the other was massaging his neck. He got rid of her underwear and kissed her abdomen, and then trailed his tongue down to her clit. She hissed in pleasure as he kept going, giving it a few circles with his tongue.

"Oh, God..." she whispered thorugh her moans and saw a grin on a face half buried in her crotch. He didn't answer hear, still working her instead... and she was pretty glad he choosed that, because it just felt fucking amazing. She knew that this guy had his dirty part, but she didn't know that it was so amazing. And then, as if he knew her thoughts and wanted to prove that she hadn't seen the best part yet, he slipped one finger inside her.

She panted as he pushed it a little bit deeper, and then removed it. "Again... Please" she whispered so softly and quiet that she wasn't sure if he heard it. The man, aware of her beggings or not, did as she wanted him to. He pushed the finger back into it's place and started to move it slowly. After a while, he removed it again but before she could protest, she felt something entering her again... This time there were two fingers.

Then, still with his one hand at her pussy, he moved to her face again, kissing her. She could taste herself in his mouth, on his tongue and lips... His nose tickled her a bit while he was kissing her, which would made her giggle if she hadn't his tongue in her mouth at the time... But even without it, she would probably be more likely rather than giggle. While he added the third finger, she trailed one of her hand down his torso again, while the other was playing with his hair at the time. He grinned, feeling her fingers on his abs and then abdomen, which encouraged her to take it further. She slipped her hand to his pants, feeling the fabric of his boxers, a little bit wet on one spot. She could feel his groin, rubbing it, feeling it's shape and size... She started to realize why he was spending so much time and effort on the foreplay. And she was pretty grateful for that.

While he added the little finger, which even despite it's size made her moan even louder, she unbuckled his belt and started to pull his pants off of him. He had to help her a bit and got rid of the rest of his clothes pretty fast. Now she could admire his whole body... It was just as perfect and amazing as she thought it would be. It felt and looked so strong, so full of life... She wanted to feel it. To taste it. She rested her hands on his chest, pushing him lightly. He got the message and landed on his back side to her as she crawled on the top of him and then kissed him. Then she started to lower her head a bit, licking his neck, his pecks, abs, his 'V" shaped waist as she finally reached his crotch. She grabbed his erect member and gave it a few strokes. She thought many stories of guys couldn't get a hard on after drinking, but it seemed like Shayne wasn't one of them... Or didn't actually drink that much.

As he was playing with her hair with one hand, she gave the tip of his dick a light lick. It made him groan pretty load, though as he pushed his hips closer to her. She gave it another lick, this time from the tip alongside the shaft to the balls. All of this man's hot skin made her aroused, but this part of his body was even warmer... She liked that as she put her lips on the tip, sucking it. The sound the blonde made was something that made her feel so dirty... but she wanted that, didn't she? So she just kept going, blowing him off the best she could.

She didn't do that for long, though, as suddenly she felt strong grip on her shoulders as he moved her closer to his face again. He kissed her hard and it felt amazing.

"I want it... Give it to me" she whispered into his ear. His eyes were closed again as he was sucking her skin on the neck. He whispered something back, but she couldn't understand him... though for a while she thought she heard on word. Or, more likely, one name... 'Damien'. But then she felt his grip on her hips as he positioned himself between her thighs. She wouldn't think or anything but Shayne at the moment. She just looked at him as he was putting the condom on.

"Ready?" he asked, his voice harsh as his throat seemed ripped. But somehow it made him just more sexy for her. She nodded slightly, as he placed a kiss on her lips and entered her. And she could swear she saw stars...

***

Yes, she saw the stars. The surface of her room just dissapeared, revealing the night sky above her. There was no moon, just bright stars. She could see all of them... So bright and beautiful.

"Oh, Damien... If you could see this" she whispered and then felt a slight touch on her hand.

"I can" he answered softly, laying with her on the soft, wet grass. They were both naked, holding hands and looking into each others eyes... She could see the stars in them as well. They reflected in them perfectly... As well as on Damien's wet pale skin. he was just shining, his strong, muscled arms and legs were full of stars... No, they were stars. Were the whole constellations. His body was so perfect.. Just as Shayne's.

And then she looked on his faced, shewanted to kiss him. But he wasn't Damien. His hair was blond, his eyes were bright. He was Shayne, looking at her with lust in his eyes... and he placed a kiss on her lips. She closed her eyes to enjoy the feeling... And when she opened them, she was alone. Except the stars... Stars that were getting brighter and brighter as they became the pure light. She was blind, she couldn't see, or hear... She could just feel the light heating her skin, her body, on the outside and inside as well. And then she shouted in pleasure.

***

Shayne's moves were getting harder, faster and more rapid with each of his thrusts into her. She could feel his tip hitting her sweet spot, she couldn't actually feel anything except that... She digged her nails into her lover's back, scratching it as she shouted again. "I'm..." she started, panting but then he just groaned and shut her with a kiss. His eyes were closed tight, but she didn't care... She felt her muscles tighten as she made it off the edge with a scream. SHayne gave her a few more hard thrust before he also came with almost beasty groan, and then he fell on her, almost choking her with his bodyweight. After a while he slipped off of her and took the condom off and thrwew it to the ground. Then they both looked at each other. They were covered in sweat, panting, messy... And felt so guilty. But at the moment they knew, that it happened. It became a fact... They had sex. They couldn't change that.

"Goodnight Shayne" she whispered as he felt her exhausted body falling into sleep.

"Goodnight Courtney" he responded softly with a broken voice, as he covered her with some sheets. They last what she saw was Shayne laying side to her and turning to face the wall. She could see red trails she had left on his back... Back that was now shaking. And she fell asleep.


	13. Tell Mama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Damien feels lucky to have such a mother.

"...and tommorow we're going to Cologne, but I won't probably have much time there" continued his mother, speaking to him from the screen of his laptop for almost half an hour. They always talked much, but this time Damien was asking even more questions, cause he has never visited Germany after they left it when he was still very young, he actually had no certain memory of his place of birth. He was very interested and curious about every detail of his mother's trip there.

"Cologne? That's big city, right? And what after Cologne?" he was asking.

"Yes, it's quite big, and very old... Then we're gonna probably go to the mountains, but not for sure yet. But enough about me, say something about you. What's new?" she changed the topic. He smiled softly, though he was a bit dissapointed, he wanted to hear more about her trip.

"Well... Not much, I think..." he started, thinking about the right way to tell her about Courtney, because he didn't want to hide it from her, of course. "But there may be one thing... I started dating someone" he said and almost bursted into laughing when he saw his mother's shocked face.

"That's great, honey! Who is she?" she responded in very enthusiastic way. Damien had a hard time pulling himself together after his previous relationship, he always was like that, overreacting everything a bit, and his mother knew that. And though he knew that she was probably a bit worried, she was also happy for him that he found someone new.

"I think I told you about her before at some point. Her name's Courtney, I work with her" he said.

"So why didn't you tell me about her before? How long do you know her?" she kept asking him.

"We're dating just for few days... And I know her for like three months, I think"

"You think? Are you not sure?" she asked jokingly and he laughed a bit awkwardly.

"Sorry... Yes, we met in April. And we're dating now... I'm still not sure if it's gonna work out, but I really like her, so I hope it will" he confessed.

"How is she?"

"Well... She's very kind and nice, she's funny... Usually quite talkative. I like spending time with her." he spoke after a while - he had to think how to describe Courtney to his mother.

"Okay... What's her full name?" she asked and Damien chuckled at that question.

"Courtney Miller... And her second name is Ruth if I remembered it right" he responded.

"Does she live in Los Angeles too? And where's she from?"

"Yes and I'm not sure where exactly, but somewhere in California too" he said. His mother hadn't asked another question yet, but he was sure that she wanted to know more.

"Still not satisfied?" he laughed. "I don't know what else I can tell you... She's left handed" he said, when this random fact came to his mind.

"Oh, hell no, a leftie? Better he's not getting any close to my son!" she joked and they both laughed. "Okay... She seems to be a nice girl. And if you say you really like her, good luck" she continiued after a while.

"Yeah, I hope it will work out... Oh, and by the way, she's friend with Shayne too" he added.

"Oh, that's nice. And what's with Shayne nowadays?" she asked.

"He's fine I think... Well, lately he seems a bit worse, but maybe he's just stressed out." he told her, thinking about his best friend again, which made his smile fade away. He was worried about him... He acted like he was feeling better at the party, but brunette knew, that something was still wrong.

"Hmm... Hasn't he told you why he's upset?"

"Not yet... I mean, he said something about being tired or stressed, but I'm not sure if that's really the case" he answered. His mother seemed to be a bit worried too... She knew that he and Shayne were friends for a really long time.

"Well... Can I ask how long does he know this Courtney? They worked together before?" she asked, surprising Damien a bit.

"Yeah, they know each other longer than I know her... I think they started to work her at the same time. But, why do you ask?". He was a bit confused, he wasn't sure what his mother meant.

"Hmm... Have you thought abot the possibility of Shayne being, you know, a little jealous? Maybe he likes that girl too..." she suggested. For a while, Damien stayed quiet.

"I... I'm not sure. BUt I don't think so. He had a thing for her some time ago, but now they're just friends... I think" he answered slowly after a moment.

"Maybe you should think about that... And talk with him" she said, smiling to him softly. 

"Yeah... That's probably a good idea... Do you think that's why he seems upset? He's jealous?"

"I don't know, darling, but that's possible... Just talk to him. He's your friend, you should be honest with yourself if you want it to stay that way..." she added. He just nodded... It seemed very sensible. "I'm sure you'll be fine... Just don't be afraid of talking" she gave him an adivce. They talked for a while more about other stuff, about his work, castings, his life in LA. Mostly random stuff, nothing really special... But it made him feel better. And after they finished and he went to take a showe, he felt really relieved. He got a little worried again when Courtney didn't respond to his message. She probably didn't hear it, it's probably loud there, he thought and decided to go to sleep. And he slept really well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, 300 hits! Thanks for reading! There should be another chapter, later, in the evening.


	14. Misery'n

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wakes up.

Shayne was just exhausted, he was gasping for breath, sweating, panting... but he felt like he had to keep running. Damien was getting further into the forest every second he was resting... He could still hear his voice echoing through the woods.

"C'mon! Catch me!" his friend kept yelling. So SHayne tried to run again, feeling how he was loosing all of his strength and energy. "Are you tired? Already!? Come on!" he heard Damien's voice from far away. His steps were also becoming less hearable for him, though he kept chasing him.

At some point, he stumbled over a root and fell into the ground, quite painfully. He groaned in pain, trying to get onto his feet again... WHen he finally made, he couldn't hear his friend anymore. "Damien!?" he shouted, but he didn't receive any response. He shouted again couple more times, but still, he could only hear echo of his own voice... Se he started to run in the same direction he was running before. He was too slow, he knew that. Too slow to catch Damien... To weak to do that. He felt like all of this running was just too much for his body.

He finally made it to some glade in the middle of the forest... But there was no one around.

"Damien?" he asked once again, this time his voice was very quiet and weak. He looked around, not seeing anyone... Only trees, bush, grass... And then he saw one different thing. In the centre of the glade, there was something on the ground... He walked slowly towards it, it was dark, so he had to lowe himself to see it. He crouched over it and saw what the object was - a dark leather jacket.

***

He opened his eyes and immadietely felt the discomfort of his position... After a while he realized he was laying on the floor side to his bed. He must've fell from it in his sleep, it happened sometimes... But it wasn't the most unuasal thing. He also realized that he was naked... He would remember if he went to sleep like that, so he tried to memorize what was going on the night before.

He tried to get onto his feet, with a bit of headache. So, I drinked, that is for sure... And... I went to the party, right. Tanner's party... and then what?, he thought, finally standing up. And when he looked on his bed, he got his answer when he saw who was laying there - Courtney Miller herself. All of his memories hit him, reminding him what she was doing here... why she came here with him. And what he had done with her on this bed. He rested his beck on the wall and slowly slided down to the floor again, covering his face with his hands.

The blonde stayed like that for a while, naked and shaking on the floor... He definetely never suspected that he would act like that after having sex with someone... But he also had never suspected that he would ever have sex with his best friends girlfriend.

"I fucked up... I fucked up so much" he whispered to himself. He heard some movement on the bed, but it seemed like the girl was still asleep. "She was drunk... I made her cheat on him" he kept whispering. "On my best friend."

He needed to calm himself down. And he needed to wash himself - he felt dirty. Literraly and also in other way... He felt like he could still sense her on his body. Her touch on his skin, her smell... Her taste. He needed a cold shower. Very cold one. He quietly grabbed some clean clothes and a towel and went to the bathroom. Though water was very cold, he stayed there for quite a long time. Water didn't help him that much as he hoped it would, but he prefered to stay there instead of taking the risk of meeting Courtney. He knew that at some point they needed to talk... to look at each other at least. But he didn't want to do it now. He just felt so awful.

Finally he left the shower cabin, dried himself with the towel and put some clothes on then. He leftthe bathroom and hear more movement in his bedroom... so he quickly headed to the kitchen to prepare some breakfast. Before he only left clean towel by the door of the bathroom, so the girl would know she can take a shower if she wanted to. He made some coffee and scrambled eggs for them. It smelled and looked really great, which made him feel even worse - he didn't want anything nice, anything good when he was such a bad and evil person. Though, he put the food and the cofee on the table and waited for the girl. He could hear as she went to the bathroom, he could hear water running. He took only a small sip of coffee, he couldn't move... He was just freezed. Every second he was getting even more stressed, and when the water stopped and after a while he could hear bathroom doors opening, he thought about running away from his own house just to escape meeting her.

But then she walked to the room. He looked at her, but not at her face - he couldn't do that. He just nodded to greet her and then looked back on his breakfest. With small gesture he showed her that he made some breakfast for her. She walked to the table, sat on the other side of it and for a while, neither of them were moving even slightly. He wanted to look at her, to say something... but he was too scared. So after a long moment of silence, he just cleared his throat and started to eat, and so Courtney did after him.

They ate in almost complete silence, drinked their coffee... It was their free day, they had no work to do, which made it even worse. Shayne couldn't just leave, saying that he had to do something... So they just ate.

After they finished, she helped him get the dishes and cups to the sink, so he could wash them.

"Thanks for the breakfast" she said.

"No problem" he answered. And then she left his house... and he kept washing the dishes, like the hot water mixed with a tear that fell from his cheek.


	15. Bye Bye Baby

Since their fight by the lake, Damien and Shayne haven't spoken to each other even single time. They actually weren't seeing each other most of the time... Always when Damien heard the other guy in the next room, he was stepping back or waiting until he left so he could go there. And Shayne seemed to act in similar way. On few occasions when they accidentelly found themselves in the same room, they only nodded or mumbled some greetings and went away as fast as they could, saying only 'Bye' sometimes... It was horrible for him. He hated ignoring the problem, he knew that he should talk it out with friend... But it was embarassing. And also the memory of the situation by the lake was hurting him in some way...

Why did he react like that?, he thought. It was only a joke... A harmless joke. He had never seemed to be homophobic or anything like that... So what happened?

He had absolutely no idea.

This was supposed to be his last day at the lakehouse - his grandma was visiting his family next day, so he promised his mom that he would come back to meet her. he packed all of his stuff already, he was ready to go, he just had to make it to the bus stop that was few miles away in two hours. It didn't seem like any problem for him, so he wasn't in big hurry. He took his time to say bye to all of his friends that were staying at the house for few more days without him. He wished them to have fun and was offered to drink some beer with them for the last time, but he kindly refused and left the house... And met Shayne just outside the doors.

The boys looked at each other for a while, both silent, only breathing heavily. Shayne was in his swimming trunks again, with towel on his shoulders and his hair still wet - it seemed like he have just came back from swimming in the lake. Damien himself had his backpack on his back, other bag in his hand, it was obvious that he was leaving.

"You... You're le-leaving? Already?" Shayne asked, stuttering a bit, looking at the taller by with those bright eyes. His surprised voice made Damien mad, but also kind of relieved as well.

"Yes... I told you about that before" Damien responded, trying to look straight into Shayne's eyes. Both of them couldn't do that though, and looked at their feet instead.

"Oh, right..." Shayne whispered, and for a while, they were silent again.

Damien cleared his throat, corrected the position of his backpack and looked at Shayne again. "I... I have to go now. I don't want to miss the bus..." he said.

"Oh... Okay... Bye, then" Shayne answered.

"Bye, Shayne" he told him and walked past him, focusing on not looking back. He just kept walking.

"Bye.." he heard once again. But he didn't turn back.

***

He was sitting with Courtney at his place. They finished their dinner a couple of minutes before. It was Sunday evening, almost night. They had been on a date this day, drinked their coffee, took a nice walk in the park, went to the art gallery... It was really nice. When he asked her to come into his house, she agreed, though she definitely seemed to act a bit strange. He had planned a dinner for her visit before and nothing more. Of course, he thought also about other possibilities and preapred for them just in case, buying some nice candles and few condoms. But it seemed like they weren't going to be used since the girl just told him she had slept with Shayne.

So they were just sitting at his table in silence. Courtney was looking at him as he was looking at his empty plate, seeing his a bit  defeatured reflection in it.

"So... What now?" he asked all of sudden, still looking at his flace in the plate.

Courtney stayed quiet for a while. He couldn't see her face at now, but he could her slow breathing. He couldn't imagine the look of her face right now. It couldn't be happy, as he was used to... He didn't know how sad Courtney would look like. But he didn't raise his eyes, though.

"I don't know" she answered. He nodded his head slowly and finally looked at her. Her face showed no emotion. Her eyes weren't red from crying, her lips weren't curved in any smile, she also wasn't angry, scared, embarassed... She was just unnaturally calm.

Damien grabbed the glass of wine that was next to his plate and took a sip of it. She took one slice of apple and for a while they weren't speaking again.

"Do you love me?" she asked, being the one to surprise the other this time. He was quiet for a while, until he looked at her again and slowly shooked his head.

"No." he responded shortly.

"Had you loved me before I told you?"

This time the silence was longer. The brunette tried to think of every memory he had with this girl in the previous couple days. He liked her... liked spending time with her. Their conversations, their laughs... But did he loved her? He hadn't thought about it.

"No." he responded finally. "And... had you loved me?" he asked.

"I don't know... But I don't think so" she said. They went silent again.

"Oh my God, Courtney..." he started, louder, breaking the silent and raising on his chair.

"I'm so so-" she started, also braking her emotionless look on her face.

"I thought I-"

"I fucked it up so badly, please just-"

"Stop it, you were drunk, I'm no-"

"It's my fault"

"It's not"

"Then it was all a mistake since the beginning?" she asked and they got quiet again. But only for a while, because suddenly they stood up and went into each other embrace. But it was only a hug, no kissing, no more touching other than the hug they shared. It was a loving hug, though. It made him warm, calm.

"It was not a mistake... We don't have to hate each other now. It just... didn't work out." he said, trying to calm her down, because he felt her shaking in his arms.

"Really?" she asked softly. He smiled lightly and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"I promise... I don't think Shayne will hate you either if you worry about that" he continued.

She slowly took a step back, still shaking a bit, but a bit more peaceful. "I don't love him. I mean, I don't want him to hate him, of course... But I wouldn't worry abot that. What with your friendship?" she asked. Damien felt bad again, thinking about that. For sure his relationship with Courtney damaged his friendship with the blonde guy, now it was clear to him. He wasn't sure why, though.

"Do you think that... Shayne love you?" he asked her.

"I don't... I think he was just upset and needed someone to be with him, that's why it happened. I think he... loves someone else?" she answered.

"Really? Who?". Damien was confused even more. But he realized that his question made the girl a bit... embarassed.

"Well, that's awkward to talk about, but... When we, you know... When I went to his house after the party" she started, looking at her feet again. This topic was hard for both ofthem still, but he hugged her again so she would know, that she can keep talking and he wouldn't be mad.

"That's okay... What happened then?"

"He seemed to be not... fully interested in me. He had his eyes closed most of the time. And... I think I heard him whispering some name... Not mine" she muttered shyly. He looked at her confused again, her words making him hurt but also curious at the same time.

"Name? What name?" he asked, but she looked down. He shook her by the shoulders very lightly, so she would look at his face. "Courtney... Who's name?" he repeated himself.

"I don't know. It was too quiet" she whispered, looking down again. She was lying, it was obvious for him... But he didn't insist further. He hugged her once again.

"So... I will ask again. What now? WIth us? With you and Shayne?" he spoke after a while.

"I think... We can stay friends. Me with you... And me with Shayne. Maybe we will need some time to fix things up, but, you know... He don't need to hurry, I think. It happens, not every relationship lasts forever. Well, maybe sleeping with a friend from work is a bigger problem... But I'm sure me and Shayne can work it out" she said after they broke the hug and looked at each other. "I would be more worried about your friendship... You guys really need to talk. There's something heavy between you two... You need two clear things up" she adviced him. He nodded... He got a similar advice from his mother, and he tried to call his best friend few times since then. he Shayne didn't call back.

"Yeah... I think you're right." he admitted, and then looked at the table again. "Umm... There's some wine and fruit left. And a cake... Maybe we can finish it?" he asked, a bit awkwardly.

She smiled a bit, but nodded. "Sure... Though I would like something different than wine. I thinik I had enough" she said. So they sat at the table again and started to talk, like nothing had changed. And when she left after another hour, he accompanied her for some time on her walk home. The moon started waxing again, but was barely visible on the sky.

"Sad that we couldn't see the new moon together" he spoke to her.

"Yeah. Very sad" she agreed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapters 've been pretty short, but soon I will write some longer ones again.  
> And thanks for almost 350 hits, everyone!


	16. Nobody Knows You When You're Down and Out

Shayne was sitting by his deck, trying to think about anything else than runing away or hiding. He could feel others staring at him, judging him silently, hating on him... And they were right, for sure. He did something horrible. He made his friend cheat on her boyfriend, ruining his best friend's relationship... He knew that people at Smosh were exited for the first couple in the 'family'. Before they were only some rumors, someone had a crush on someone else, mostly Sohinki on every girl in the company... But Damien and Courtney were first to actually start dating each other. And he was the one to ruin it...

He didn't know if neither Damien or Courtney told anyone about what happened, he wasn't actually sure if Damien knew... But he assumed he did, because he heard the blond girl talkin with Olivia, and she said that they broke up. What would be the other reason than the night she had spend with Shayne? And everyone that were at Tanner's party at the time also could imagine what happened, as they saw him dancing with Courtney in quite intimate way at the party after Damien left. And they they both disappeared...

Olivia knows what happened for sure, Courtney texted her that she went to my place to sleep, he thought. She probably told Mari and Boze, maybe even Sarah... Probably everyone knows what i did by now, he kept assuring himself that he was truly a bad person. He fully believed in that. And he had no one to talk with about it... He couldn't go to Damien, of course, he wasn't sure if he would ever be able to talk with him again, to look at him. He probably could talk with David, but there was no good opportunity for that yet... And he wasn't even sure if he wanted to talk about it. He was so ashamed...

He couldn't stand this feeling of everyone staring at him, he had to leave. So he stood up and quickly left the room and decided to go to the bathroom to avoid meeting anyone on the corridor by accident. He walked inside and walked to the sink to wash his face with cold water... He needed to calm himself down again. He was shaking again, he didn't know how to relieve all of this stress... He wanted to scream, but he knew that the walls weren't that thin to keep this in secret. Everyone would stare at him even more, and it would be much harder to avoid talking with anyone.

Then, when he was almost ready to start crushing the mirror with his bare fists, he heard water flushing behind him. He turned around to see Noah walking out of the cabin. "Oh, hi" he greeted him casually and walked to the sink to wash his hands. Shayne for a while was just too shocked to react. He didn't think about checking if anyone was in bathroom... he was very lucky that the younger guy made some noise at this moment, because he was about to do something crazy. And it would even worse if anyone saw that.

"Err... Hi" he answered slowly and watched as boy was drying his hands with some paper towel. He walked towards him with curious look that made the blonde feel a bit awkward and even more stressed out.

"So... Were you the one to screw it up?" he asked all of sudden, still chill and casual. And Shayne almost punched him.

"Oh, fuck you" he told him and turned to leave, but felt Noah's hand on his shoulder.

"Come on, I don't blame you! I mean, I think you caused it, but I don't think it was your fault... You get it?" he started to explain, but not very effectively.

"No, not really" Shayne said.

"I mean that you did nothing wrong... Okay, maybe it wasn't right, maybe you made a mistake, but I think they wouldn't be dating for a long time neither you did that or not. I mean... I talked a bit with Olivia and then with Wes... Most people actually think that they just didn't fit each other. To be best friends, sure, but not for more serious relationship..." he continued and Shayne stopped, looking at his friend confused.

"I still don't get it... And why are you telling me this anyway?" he asked.

"Because you seem to feel very guilty about all of this. You made a mistake, you shouldn't do that... But I know that you wouldn't do that if something wasn't wrong... What happened? You seem to be very upset for a week... What's going on, man?" he said, and Shayne sighed a bit. "You know, if you don't want to talk about that with me, you don't have to, but I think you should say it to some-"

"I don't know" he shutted him. "I feel just... horrible. I don't think that's about Courtney... You know that I had something for her before, but not anymore... I don't know why all of this happened" he continued.

"You know... Maybe you feel lonely? Maybe you need someone in your life, and seeing your best friend finding girlfriend just made you realize it..." Noah suggested, but Shayne didn't respond to it. He had to think about what his friend was saying to him. He surely wasn't always comfortable with being single, sometimes the loneliness was making him feel down or just mad at everything... But usually it wasn't that bad. He always had some friends to kinda fill in the emptiness caused by having nobody to love... or to be loved by.

"Yeah... Maybe you're right. But that knowledge doesn't make me feel any better" he said finally.

"Well... Knowledge is not the solution, is the key to it, I think" Noah answered. Shayne looked at him a bit surprised.

"Wow... Were you preparing for this conversation before or what?" he joked, smiling lightly.

"Sure, dude, for a whole month" he answered jokingly and they both laughed for a while. It made the blonde feel a bit relieved... but not enough.

"Thanks, Noah... I still don't know how to deal with all of this... But now it seems a bit easier. Thank you" he said to his friend.

"No problem, man" the boy answered and walked closer to him to hig the bigger guy. Shayne hugged him back and smiled a bit wider. "If you want to talk or something, just tell me, anytime" he added, and the blonde nodded.

"Sure, I will... Thanks again" he said and then the younger guy left the bathroom and he followed him soon, feeling a bit calmer at the moment. He was lost in his thoughts, thinking about how to solve this problem... and then something came to his made. Talking with Noah there reminded him of different bathroom meeting he had before. He wasn't sure if it was the best idea... but he was thinking about trying it anyway.


	17. Blind Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Damien also needs some guidance.

As days were passing, things started to get better, more like before the whole razzle-dazzle they made. Damien still felt awkward near Courtney, seeing her reminding him how happy his life seemed to be for few days... But he was glad they managed to not hate each other - she was still a nice girl, he wanted to be friends with her. He wasn't sure if he still could think about her in normal way, but he liked to think that after some time he would be able to do that.

But Shayne... It was different with him. It was Thursday now and they still haven't talk about that... or about anything else. He hated that, bu he didn't know how to start conversation with him. He had no idea what was going on with his friend, he wasn't even sure if he could still call him his best friend... or even any kind of friend. It was horrible feeling, that insecurity. Since they met, Damien could relay on Shayne mostly every time. They had only few fights, but every time they managed to get through this... After serious talk, usually. So he knew what he had to do - talk with him. But it only sounded easy... Since Monday every time he would meet Shayne on corridor or any other place, the blonde would just leave, too fast for the brunette. He wasn't also texting him, wasn't picking up the phone when Damien was calling him.

Is he mad at me?, he thought. But why? Should I be the one to be angry? I don't think he had a cruh on Courtney or anything like that... So why can't we just move on with this shit?, he was asking himself. But he couldn't figure out the answer.

***

Most of the Smosh Games members finished their work, only he and Flitz left in their office. Flitz usually just wasn't in hurry, and this time Damien also had no reason to rush.

"So... How are you doing?" Flitz asked him, and Damien smirked lightly.

"Well, could be better, but, you know... And you?" he answered, turning on his chair to face the other guy. Amra sat on the chair next do the brunette and looked at him.

"Not bad, but don't mind to talk more about yourself, you seem to be in more interesting place now" he told him, and Damien smirked again.

"Yeah, I guess it was a bit unusual... But now things are settling down, I think. It's very awkward with Courtney now sometimes, but, you know, I think we can work it out, we just need some time" the brunette said, scratching the back of his head.

"And Shayne?". This question made Damien's smirk fade away. He stayed quiet, looking at his feet. "Have you guys talked about that?" he asked him.

"No" Damien answered shortly. "I tried to... But he seems to be avoiding me. I'm not sure why..." he continued. "But, man... Sorry, I don't know if I want to talk about him, I just don't know what's going on..."

"No problem. So, back to Courtney... If I can ask you something..." Flitz started and looked at Damien. The brunette nodded, so the other guy continued "Why you gave up so easily with her? I mean, I understand, she cheated, but didn't ya think about trying to, I don't know, fix it, to stay with her?"

"Yeah, sure, I thought... But we agreed that we should break up. I didn't dumped her, neither she did me, we just... agreed on that. We realized that he didn't, you know... love each other. From the beggining" he explained a bit awkwardly.

"Hmm... Why? I mean, it may bea dumb question, but, you know... Why didn't you love her?" Flitz asked, making him silent for a while again.

"I'm not sure... It happened with few other girls before. I wanted to love them, but... I don't know. At the end it always wasn't the thing I expected. I expected love to be more like..." he started and stopped for moment to think about good comparision. "More like... relation between best friends, but more intimate. Like... I don't know. I haven't ben in relationship like that with any girl, and I don't want to treat my girlfriend like my mother... I don't know how to describe that." he continued.

"Maybe like... you would date Shayne?" Flitz asked him, making a high score in making Damien akwardly silent.

"Well... I didn't thought about that, but yes, more like that. Well, maybe nowadays it doesn't seem like that, but back in the days, we could just tell each other about everything, he would make me happy, it was always funny with him, I could relay on him... So yeah. I expected falling in love with a girl to be more like... I don't know. I think would want to be in relationship with a girl that would be like a Shayne for me. Or something like that" the brunette agreed. "But... I haven't found any girl like him"

"So, maybe, you know... you should think about not only girls..." Flitz spoke after a while.

Damien looked at him surprised, even shocked. Is he hitting on me, he thought, but quickly realized it probably wasn't the thing his friend meant by this.

"So... You suggest that... I might be... gay?" he slowly asked him.

"Well, there's some more options, maybe you like both girls and boys, maybe you just don't care... Have you ever thought about that?"

"At some point, yeah, I thought... But it just didn't seem... I don't know. I'm not sure..."

"So maybe you should think about that again... Cause maybe that's the point of all your trouble in relationships" Flitz said. Damien, after another moment of awkward silence, nodded slowly.

"I will think about that... Thanks, Flitz" he said.

"No problem, man... Good luck!" he told him and left the room, leaving Damien alone with his thoughts.


	18. One Night Stand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shayne looks for a substitute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *warning* - read the title

Shayne lowered himself for a better angle, as he focused on the blue ball on the table. He waited for a while, took a deep breath, and the hit it, scoring a point.

"Good at aiming, don't you?" the guy said, as he walked to the table to play his turn. Shayne still didn't know his name... He also didn't have his number or anything, he just came to this bar, somehow knowing that he would be there. And he was, smiling at him, standing close to the pool table. And they started to play, playing their fourth round at the time.

"I guess I'm not bad" he answered, shrugging his shoulders. This guy was actually no match for him, he won one round mostly because the blond let him, so he wouldn't be mad. Usually he played with Damien, which was much more worthy rival... But he couldn't play with him now. It was Friday night, he destroyed his relationship on previous weekend and hasn't talked with neither Damien or Courtney ever since... But now he didn't want to think about that. He just wanted to play, to have some fun, to forget. And he was doing pretty good job at it.

"Modest, like that, Sean" he told him, smiling again. Shayne smirked, but didn't correct him... He didn't care about that at all.

"Thanks" he said, watching the guy playing, lowering himself as well, grabbing the cue, aiming... He was good looking, he had to admit that. He was tall, pretty well built, had nice dark hair... He had nothing special, was jus handsome. Wasn't good at the game, though, as he accidentally potted the black ball into the whole, losing the round byt this move. He sighed irritated, but then looked at Shayne and laughed.

"Guess you won again... Wanna play another round?" he asked him.

"Nah, I think it is time to walk home..." the blonde answered, looking into this guy's eyes.

"Walk?" he asked, surprised.

"Yeah, I live pretty close"

"Really? Me too" the guy said, not breaking the eye contact as well. Shayne smirked, ponting at the door.

"Then I guesss we can go" the blonde said. They payed for the beer they drinked and left the place.

***

The guy almost ripped Shayne's shirt off of his chest, after they landed on his bed at Shayne's place. He was now only in his pants, while his 'new friend' was already down to his boxers. As the blonde placed his hands on his hips as the guy was trailing wet kisses on his neck and pecs, clearly enjoying his muscles. Shayne himself slipped his hands into guy's boxers, grabbing his ass cheeks, massaging them with his thumbs and also sucking red marks into man's neck.

"Oh, yeah, keep doing that, babe..." he moaned, and Shayne was happy to follow his orders. After some more pleasurable carreses, he guy started to lower himself, still licking and kissing the blonde's chest, his abs and finally his abdomen. "Get ready for the ride to the heaven, handsome" he whispered, grinning at him as he started to unbuckle his belt and push down his pants and boxers.

Shayne didn't answer, but waited, looking at the man and grabbing his dark hair, playing with it as the guy grabbed his shaft and stroked it few times. The blonde gronaed lightly, enjoying the touch of this stranger on his body. Because he was definitely a stranger to him - he had no idea who this guy was, where did he lived, he didn't even know his name... But he stil didn't care. He didn't need his name to let him suck him off.

The guy wrapped his lips around his cock tip, giving it few licks. His tongue and fingers were definitely skilled in this and Shayne thought that his promise of the 'heaven ride' wasn't just some bragging. He groaned once again, pushing guy's head deeper onto his member. He heard a small gag from him, but didn't stop... it seemed like he liked that. He kept sucking him, even harder, more passionate, plaing with his balls at the same time.

"Oh, no, don't stop..." he moaned as the guy let his dick go, and went lower to lick his ballsack.

"Say my name... Tell me how much you love it" he told him, grabbing his balls and wriggling them. Shayne moaned, trying to pretend he didn't hear the question to avoid the awkward situation. "Say it..." the guy whispered again, looking at the blonde, who's face made it pretty obvious that he didn't know the name.

"You're an asshole, Sean" the guy said, letting his dick go and standing up. Shayne moved quickly to him and grabbed his arm as the guy was turning to leave the room.

"Oh, c'mon... You really care about that?" he asked him, smirking. He felt like the worst douche at this moment... but he also wanted to finish what he started. As fast as he could, and then never see this man again. Probably.

"Who do you think I am, huh?" the guy asked him, sounding a bit angry.

"I don't know, that's the point..." the blonde told him, still smirking. "Come on, you don't know me neither... I'm Shayne, not Sean, if you wanna know" he told him. The guy stopped, and after a moment, he laughed.

"Mark" he introduced himself, reaching for a handshake. Shayne shook his hand, feeling how it was still a bit wet and warm from the handjob.

"Nice to meet you..." Shayne spoke and pulled the guy closer to the bed. He stood up and they started to kiss again, rubbing each other hot bodies, feeling their muscles... Mark was stroking Shayne dick, as the blonde was rubbing his through the fabric of his underwear.

"Don't you think you should, you know...  repay the favor" Mark said, pointing down with his head. Shayne slowly swallowed and cleard his throat.

"Sure" he said and lowered himself. He slowly pulled brunette's boxers off to his ankles and looked at the cock in front of his face. He slowly grabbed it and gave it few strokes, not really sure what to do next.

"Haven't you done that before?" the guy asked him, laughing a bit. When Shayne shooked his hand, he felt hand resting on the back of his head, playing with his messy hair. "Then let me guide you" Mark whispered. "Give it few licks at first... Make it wet and nice" he whispered, and Shayne obeyed. He gave the tips few licks, then one longer to the shaft and balls. The taste he felt was something new for him... He was aroused and also kinda disgusted at the same time... but more aroused, definitely, so he kept doing that.

"Now, put your lips around it" he heard and wrapped his mouth around the tip slowly and carefully. "Watch for the teeth" the guy whispered through his moans and pushed his head a bit deeper. When the tip touched the bakc of Shayne throat, he pulled back quickly and coughed few times. "Yeah... You will get used to it. And maybe even like it" mark whispered and leaded his mouth back on his cock again. This time Shayne was even more carefull, working more with his tongue than throat, but Mark started to push his head again at some point. He tried very hard to breath through his nose, which was pressed against Mark's abdomen, and after few moments, he managed to. It was very exhausting for him though to do it by himself, so he decid to just let the guy above him do all the work. Mark was just humping his face, sliding his dick in and out... It hurted Shayne throat, but he liked the feeling. He enjoyed the pain... He always knew that he had some kink for that, but he had never had a good opportunity to enjoy that before. And now... well, he had a great one.

But Mark got tired or bored of fucking his face at some point and pulled off. Shayne was gasping for air, his lips were read, his throat felt like burning... but he was never this horny in his life before.

"Now let's have some real fun, handsome... Got condoms?" the brunette asked him. Shayne didn't answer, just moved quickly to his nightstand and pulled out whole pack of them... and also a small bottle of lube. But he wasn't embarrassed of it at the moment... he had just let stranger fuck his face, having lube in his bedroom didn't seem like anything embarrasing comapred to that.

"Nice..." Mark whispered and moved to the bed. THey kissed again, rubbing each other bodies... The taller guy grabbed Shayne dick and put a condom on it, and then landed on his hands and knees on the band, turning so his ass was facing Shayne. "C'mon... I want to fell your meat, handsome" he whispered, shaking his butt. Shayne was just looking him, not moving... "What is it? Want to try different position?" Mark asked, sounding pretty confused.

"Yeah... You can say so"


	19. I Need a Man to Love

Damien was sitting on the couch in his apartament, scrolling through the camera roll on his phone... He was surprised how many photos of Shayne he had there. Some of them Shayne sent him from his trips, some of them were taken by somoneelse on various different occasions - some of theme pictured Shayne and Damien together, on the other they were splitted. Also there many that Damien took himself... and he was again quite surprised how many of them showed Shayne shirtless. He had no idea he had so many photos like those. He was kinda bored, it was Saturday afternoon, he had no plans for the evening, so he decid to count how many pictures of half naked Shayne he had on his phone.

After he made it to twenty photos and scrolled just thourgh few months, he started to think that it wasactually good idea - it was funny and kept his mind busy, which was also nice. He had a lot of things to think about, it was tiring and stressful, so it was nice to find something different to do for at least some time.

While looking at his best friend body, he started to think about Flitz's advise again. What if I'm really into men?, he asked himself. My friendship with Shayne is already at horrible state, I don't I should risk damaging it even more. Telling him that would make things just more awkward, I think... Of course, if he doesn't like me that way too, he thought.

After he realized what had just came to his mind, he almost dropped his phone to the floor.

Wait... Do  _I_ like him like that?, he thought and started to figure out what his relation with Shayne really was. And after a while, he relaized, that he had no idea.

He tried memorize evrything about their longtime friendship... How they met, how they became friends, how they acted together, how they were roommates for some time... And how they get 'together' again when he came to work in Smosh. They had only few more serious fights, and they usually were just some dumb misunderstandings. He remembered one they got into at their vacations at the lake when they were stil teenagers. It was about some stupid joke Damien made... he acted like they were a couple when their friends found them swimming naked in the lake. The memory of this made the brunette feel a bit weird... He remembered how Shayne got mad about that, how weird his friend acted. It surprised Damien very much back then, he had no idea why the guy would react that way... It was just a joke, usually it was obvious for both of them. They buried the hatchet after some time, of cours,e they talked, both apologized... But to this day Damien wasn't sure what was it all about.

Shayne was so uncomortable about those 'gay' jokes... But why?, he thought. And some ideas came to his mind, all of them sounding pretty crazy. What if he... No, no way. I would realize if my best friend was gay... I think, at least, he thought.

He wasn't sure what to think about all of this... And he had no idea who could he ask for an advice. Noah and David knew Shayne pretty well, but definitely not better than Damien himself... If he wasn't sure about Shayne's sexuality, who would be than maybe Shayne himself?

So... Maybe I should just ask him?, he thought. But quickly decided that it was a dumb idea. Either Shayne was or wasn't interested in men, the question would be weird and awkward for them. And what after he would get the answer? Positive answer would made him think if Shayne has a crush on him, a negative probably would Shayne do that. It would be just awkward. Maybe I should not think about Shayne being gay or not if I don't know it about myself..., he thought. Maybe I shouldfigure out myself in first place.

And he decided to do that... He had no idea how to start though. He tried to think of Shayne in some different way, picturing himself as his potential partner... It felt surprisingly normal. They were spendind so much time together, it wouldn't make too much difference, at least at first. They already were roommates in the past and both were pretty comfrotable with liing together then... They knew each other very well. So maybe it wasn't so strange idea as he thought it should be at first?

He picked up his phone again and looked at those photos of his best friends he had there... He looked at his defined body, his jaw, his eyes, his hair... He started to compare old photos of Shayne with more current ones. He tried to think if he prefered him with bright or darker hair, what clothes fitted him the best... He looked at his various different smiles, always wide, with those bright teeth shining at him... He smiled at the sight of this face. He felt happy, for a while he forgot about all of his trouble... And when he realized that, he knew what he had to do. He closed the camera roll and started to type the number. He needed to call someone.


	20. Try Just a Little Bit Harder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for over 400 hits, everyone! That's realy nice.

Courtney was sitting by her laptop or her bed, listening to some Shakira songs and editing a video she took some time ago for a vlog. She liked doing those vlogs, but on a Saturday evening she hoped for something more... exiting. But maybe it was a good idea to stay home and do something usual, she slept with her friend and ended her relationship on previous weekend, so maybe it would be better to just rest at home this weekend... T least she thought so.

But then something interrupted her work - it was her phone buzzing. She grabbed it and saw that Damien was calling. She turned off the music and accepted the call.

"Hey, what's up?" she asked, trying to sound chill and not nervous at all. She almost made it, but the guy actually didn't sound like he cared.

"Hi, sorry, but I didn't know who should I ask about that, cause it's kinda, you know..." he started, speaking very fast, so it was hard for her to understand him.

"Whoa, man, slower! What do you mean? Is something wrong?" she asked, laughing, but also staring to worry a little. He sounded really stressed out.

"Yeah, kinda. Or maybe not, I don't know. I mean, it's hard to tell, really. Okay, nevermind, I need your help..." he continued, slowing down only a bit.

"Wait, help? What happened? Are you okay?" she answered, staring worry about him for real.

"Oh God, that's the point, I don't know. I need someone for another opinion, you know, adive and all... Can you please come over to my place?" he asked. She was shocked at first, she thought for a while that it was some stupid joke... But he sounded deadly serious. It actually frightened her a bit.

"Sure, I will be there as fast as I can" she responded.

"Oh my, thank you, really, you're saving my life!" he said before ending the call. She looked at it for a moment more, before standing up to get dressed for leaving.

***

She arrived at his door around half an hour later - she had a really good lack that she managed to not get into the traffic. She took a deep breath, having absolutely no idea what to expect behind the door, and knocked on it. She heard quick steps and soon the door opened. She saw the brunette in jeans and unbuttoned shirt, looking like he was in some serious danger, he was sweating on his forehead, his cheeks were red...

"Jesus, thanks for coming..." he said, letting her walk inside. She felt a bit weird for multiple reasons. One of them was that the last time she here, they broke up... And the second was that it was her first time to see his naked torso. Well, half naked, but it wasn't the point. But she felt determined not to blush - it was awkward enough.

"So, what's wrong? Honestly, you freaked me out..." she asked, looking very worried at him. He guided her to his bedroom, making her even more uncomfortable.. Inside, she saw all of his wardrobes, cabinets and closets opened, with many clothes on the bed or the floor. She turned to face her with face deadly serious.

"I need you to help me pick up the outfit" he told her.

She opened her mouth and left her jaw hanging like that for few seconds. "You... Are you fucking kidding me!?" she almost shouted at him. She seriously thought about punching him but the she saw his brown puppy eyes looking at her, so desperate and worried... She couldn't resist that. Though she was still a bit angry. "Like, for real?" she asked. He nodded. "Oh my fucking God... Couldn't you, I don't know, facetime me and show me few shirts or something like that? Jesus!" she said. He looked down onto his feet, ashamed.

"I have a lot of clothes..." he tried to explain himself, sounding so sad and miserable, she couldn't be mad at him. And she laughed.

"Last time I came over to someone to help them pick the outfit was when my friend was getting married and she had to pick her wedding dress..."

"Please. I couldn't call Boze, she would kill me if I did that again, Flietz wasn't picking up the phone... You're my last hope!" the brunette almost begged.

"Alright, alright! I will help you, but don't expect me to not tell anyone, cause this is fucking hillarious" she joked, tries to ease the tension between them. "So... What's the occasion?" she asked, making him even more embarrassed.

"Well... That's kinda the point, cause it kind of a... Okay, maybe not exactly, but you could call it a... date?" he muttered, fully red on his face. She looked at him, confused and also blushing. It was weird enough of him to call her to help him pick up the outfit, but now it just got more awkward. And not very polite of the brunette.

"O...kay... That's a bit weird, but I guess you are really desperate" she spoke after a while. He nodded slowly and gave her apologizing look. "I will help you... But I need to know more. What kind of date is it? Where are you taking her? Who is she?" she asked, a bit nervous... But definitely not as much as Damien looked to be.

"That's also a bit awkward... Cause, you know..." he started, looking down again, as if he was avoiding her sight.

"No... I actually have no idea what's going on" she said.

"Yes, I know.. it's just... Err... Cause that person is not.. 'she', actually..." he continued, slowly raising his head to face her.

"Wait... Damien, are you trying to tell me..." she started, very confused.

"Yes. He's a guy... He is... Shayne." he finally finished. He looked at his feet again, as she walked to him and sat on the bed next to him. SHe placed her hand on his shoulder, trying to comfrot him a bit. It was weird to touch him again, but she knew that a good, supportive friend would do that... And she wanted to be one. Even if it was awkward as hell.

"Don't worry. I will help you" she started and got onto her feet again, looking at all of his clothes around the room. She tried to focus on her task, not on imagining her ex with the gy she had sex with a week ago... It wasn't easy, for sure, but she tried her best. "So... Where are you taking him?" she asked, trying to get more info.

"That is... another problem. He doesn't know that yet. I just wanted to, you know... Just come to his place wit ha visit. And... talk to him. Figure stuff out" he said, also standing up.

"Oooh, without warning him first? Romantic" she joked. "Do you want to look in any special way or something? Wanna be like usual or more surprising, to amaze him?"

He looked very focused as well and went silent for a while, clearly thinking about his answer. "I... I think I should be more... like normal. Natural... I mean, to be myself..." he spoke finally. She nodded slowly, looking at him.

"Yeah... You guys were best friends. You rust each other, right? So it seems to be good idea to... be yourself" she agreeed.

"So... No suits or any official outfits..." he said, poiting at his clothes again. She nodded in agreement.

"Jeans and some t-shirt or something like that should be fine..."

"But... which one?" he asked. There were plenty of shirts of different kinds in the room. She thought for a while and then pointed dark-green t-shirt.

'Try this on" she said and he walked to it and started to pull his shirt off... and then stopped and looked at her embarrassed.

"Sorry... It is okay to do it here..." he started, but she laughed, also a bit awkwardly.

"Just make it quick" she answered. So he pulled his shirt off, blushing, and put the green one on, as she suggested.

"It's nice... Try with this white shirt on top of it..." she started. For good fifteen minutes they were trying different shirts, pants, even socks... No one said anything about boxers, and she was glad it did;'t happen. It would be just  _too_ weird. They picked up pair of dark-blue jeans, black socks and had to choose between longsleeved green shirt or dark-red t-shirt with black and gray checked flanel on it.

"You look good in green, like a nice guy, definitely... But that red and black combination makes you look, you know... pretty hot" she said. The tension was not so bad now, she actually was enjoying it now... at least a bit. They were telling some jokes, laughing, it didn't seem so bad.

"But... I don't know if I want to look  _hot_. I don't know if he thinks about my that way... I actually have no idea if he have any feelings for me anyway..." he started to get nervous again, but she shutted him down quicky.l

"Damien, he was moaning your name with me" she told him. And he pulled the red t-shirt on pretty quickly. After couple of minutes he was nice and ready, looking pretty damn good... It made her feel weird again, but she tried no to show it.

"And? Is it enough?" he asked her.

"Sure... Just take a shower before, cause you were sweating so much through all ofthis" she joked, though she was serious about the sweat. They both laughed. He offered her a coffee before leaving, but she refused politely and decid to leave. When she was at the door, they hugged again.

"Thanks, Courtney... For everything" he whispered as they broke the hug.

"Don't have to... I'm glad I could help. Good luck, Damien" she said and left, leaving his home. And, surprisingly even to her, she felt... happy. Happy that she could her a friend in need.


	21. Combination of the Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's gonna be some violence and other heavy adult stuff, so, you know. *warning*

It was dark outside, around 10 PM. Shayne usually would be out at this time, or maybe watching Game of Thrones or some other show... bu he wasn't. He was walking around his flat, checking every corner, every furniture, making sure there was no sign of what happened there last night. He had no idea it would be so horrible afterwards. After he had sex with Courtney, he felt guilty because she was his friend and was dating Damien. And that guy, Mark... SHayne thought it would be harmless. That it would just help him forget about everything, help him relax. And well, it didn't. Didn't do that at all. He couldn't sleep all night when that man was laying next to him. At the morning, he tried to be not too rude, but made it pretty clear that he didn't want to see him again. And after he left, he fell asleep on the couch. After he left, he clenaed everything, including himself, spending almost hour in the shower. And he was still looking around, trying to find and destroy any potential trace, like he had comitted some crime. Because he felt like he did.

He left the living room and went to his bedroom again. He was walking a bit jerkily, like he his leg was hurting or something like that, which was actually close to the truth. Though, he didn't want to think about that... or about that, that it the same bedroom where he had sex with Courtney and this guy... This room just made him feel even worse, but he wanted to make sure everything was clean... And then he saw it. Under the wardrobe, some small dark object, with metal shining part though. he crouched, stressing out completely and saw car keys...

"No fucking way" he whispered, grabbing the keys. He stood up, looking at them with disbelief. "Oh, fuck no!" he almost shouted and punched the wall with his bare fist. It didn't help him calm down at all... It only hurted, but he actually liked it. He felt like he deserved the pain, like he deserved all the worst things in the world.

What kind of man doesn't realize they forgot their fucking car keys? What now? Maybe he forgot his fucking phone!, the thought. He grabbed the keys and put them in the pocket of his jeans. He doesn't have my number, but he knows my adress, he can come here any time..., he thought.

"Fuck!" he shouted and sat on the floor, covering his face. He was freaking out - he didn't want to meet that guy again. He was scared of seeing him again... Cause what if he would not resist and do that again? What if he secretly wanted more? He felt just horrible and so, so much lonely... He took this guy to feel loved, to finish his loneliness, but it just made it worse. He had no idea what he wanted, he had no idea what he needed... He was just so confused.

No... I know what I need, he thought after a while. I need my friend... My best fucking friend. I need Damien, but I can't meet him. I can't talk to him... Cause I fucked it all up. I destroyed eveyrthing... I couldn't look at him now. I don't deserve him... I should just leave this city. Maybe this country... Maybe I should leave everything.

And then, some noise interrupted his dark thoughts. It was his door bell ringing. He slowly got onto his feet, terrified of what had to come. He had to open them, meet the guy... I will just hand him his keys and close the doors. I can do that. I can, surely, he thought, slowly walking to the door. The door bell ringed again, but he started moving even slower, scared and embarassed. But he finally made it to the door, grabbed the handle with one hand, while the other one grabbed the car keys from his pocket, ready to hand it to the man as fast as possible. He took a deep breath, and then opened the doors to see... Damien.

For a while, he just stood there, with hiw mouth opened,goggling his eyes, his hand with the keys shaking. THe burnette was in dark-blue jeans, red t-shirt and dark flanel shirt... He looked so casual and normal, it was incredible for Shayne, because he felt like his friend couldn't just arrive with no special reason. He expected to see him by his doors only if someone died or something like that, but he was definitely smiling at him, maybe a little bit shyly, but still...

"Da-Damien?" he stuttered.

"Yeah, it's me... Sorry to arrive without any warning, but... I don't know. Are you busy?" he asked and then looked at the keys in his hand. "Oh... Were you just leaving?" he asked.

"No, no, no! It's just... nothing. I'm not busy, please, come in" he assured him. They walked back into the flat again and sat by the couch. "You want anything to drink or to eat or..." the blonde started.

"Sure, I will have some tea, please" the brunette said, looking just as nervous as Shayne was. The shorter guy walked to the kitchen, which wasn't separated from the living room by any wall, so they both could still see each other. Shayne turned on the electric kettle, pouring some water there at first, grabbed two cups and waited for the water to boil. Damien also sat from the couch and walked to the kitchen. He looked at Shayne a bit worried.

"Shayne... Did you hurt your leg or something?" he asked, pointing at his legs. Shayne almost cursed out loud, realizing he forgot about hiding his 'special' way of walking.

"Oh, no, no, it's nothing... I just, you know... pulled a muscle" he explained, a bit nervously. "Green or black?" he asked him to change the topic. Damien chose the green tea, and Shayne decided to do the same. After a while the tea was ready, so they grabbed their cups and returned to sit on the couch. Damien was walking behind the blonde, so he tried to walk as natural as he could, but failed. he couldn't hide that something was wrong.

"You need some help? Maybe I will carry your tea... Or help you walk?" the brunette asked, worried. Shayne shook his head, laughing a bit nervously, trying to ease the tension.

"No, it's nothing, really..." he assured him again and they sat. The tea was too hot to drink yet, so they looked at each other. Neither of them looked like they know what to do now, though brunette was the first one to speak.

"Shayne I... I wanted to talk to you... about all of what happened last week" he started. Shayne gulped slowly, looking into those brown eyes with a bit of fear and shame.

"Yeah, that's... That's probably good idea. Damien, I'm so, so sorry..."

"No, I'm sorry, I should tell about Courtney before..."

"I ruined your relationship, I was drunk, please..."

"I was afraid to tell you, I didn't know you would react..."

"It was just so horrible, what I've done, please, forgive me..."

"It was all a mistake since the beginning" Damien stated. Shayne looked at him confused.

"What was a mistake?" he asked, scared almost to death. Does he mean our friendship?, he thought.

"My relationship with Courtney... I thought it will be fine after some if I try really hard. But it wasn't... It just couldn't work out" he said and then looked into Shayne's eyes. "Because she wasn't the one I wanted..." he added and the looked down, at the table. For a long while they were silent, until Shayne slowly grabbed his tip and took a small sip. Damien quickly did the same.

"So... It wasn't beacuse of me?" the blonde asked.

"No... I don't think so, at least. I think it actually helped us realize that we shouldn't be together... I won't thank you for that, of course, but you know" he laughed a bit after his last words, then took another sip and looked at his friend seriously again. "You don't hae to worry about that... It wasn't your fault"

"Don't say that... I did something horrible. I want you to forget and forgive me, of course... But only truly. Don't hide it if you're mad at me, yell at me, punch me, whatever... I deserve it" he answered, trying to stand Damien's look.

"Stop it, Shayne... I think I understand why you did this. It was bad... It was wrong. But everyobody makes mistakes sometimes... I'm not mad" he said.

"You... you understand?" he stuttered a bit again.

"Yeah... I think so. Because I think it might have been a reason similar to mine... You know, why I tried to date Courtney. Because I was lonely... I was tired of being lonely. I wanted someone in my life to be, you know... To be more than just a friend. Even a best one" he spoke, still looking at Shayne. The blonde put back his cup of tea on the table and looked at the brunette.

"Damien... You're right. I am lonely... I-I think a terribly lonely... It makes me do things that I reall,y really regret, I... I" he started to get very nervous again, but before he finished his sentence, they heard a door bell ringing once again. Shayne went fully pale on his face while Damien looked at him confused.

"What's that?" he asked, still drinking his tea.

"I don't know" he lied, and then walked to the door slowly. Oh God, why now?, he thought. But he knew he had to face it... He had to open the door. Then he could just make it quick - hand the keys, say goodbyes, the end. Nothing more. He opened the door and saw Mark grinning at him. He hated this face so much at this moment.

"Hi, Sean, what's up?" he said "Sorry, but I think I forgot something last ni-" he started, but the blonde quickly handed him his keys.

"Yeah, I noticed. Bye now!" he told him and almost managed to close the door before the guy spoke again.

"Wow, seriously? I walked here by foot, won't you invite me for a cup of coffee or anything? Or maybe more?" he said, smiling again.

"No, sorry, I'm kinda busy. Bye!" he said and shut the door, and then locked them. And he stood there until he ehard Mark's steps, which meant that he left... He sighed with relief and returned to the couch, avoiding Damien's look.

"Who was this guy? And why did he call you Sean?" the brunette asked him, laughing a bit. Shayne took large sip of his tea, trying to calm down a bit... That's why he liked the green one. Though, it didn't help him this time.

"Oh, just some dude I met some time ago... He's not my friend or anything, I'm not sure what is his name neither, but I had his keys, so he had to come here, it's nothing" he said, a bit too fast to not sound suspicious, but he tried his best. His cup was empty, just as Damien, so he stood up. "Want some more?" he asked.

"No, thanks, I'm good" Damien answered, looking yet worried and suspicious at his friend. Shayne felt his eyes on him when he walked to the kitchen, so he tried his best to walk in natural way, but he failed, again. He turned on the kettle again, and the turned himself to face brunette, who walked into the kitchen after him.

"Shayne... Where have you met? And when?" he asked. Shayne was pale, his forehead was sweating abit, though he tried to hide it.

"At a bar... Like a week or two ago or something..." he answered. he didn't want to lie, he was too scared to do that.

"Okay... One more question" he said, and blonde nodded, trying to look cool. "Which muscle did you pull?"

Shayne looked at his feet. A while ago he was just taling with his best friend, he felt hope again, he thought it all might get better again... And now he felt like the whole world was against him. But he also felt he deserved it, again. And he didn't respond to the brunette.

"Oh, you motherfucker!" Damien yelled and turned to leave.

"No, please, it's not like that, please, Damien, please, don't go, not now, please, just please, stay, I beg you" Shayne started to talk fast, following the taller man as he walked to the door. Before he could open it, Shayne stood in his way, leaning his back on the door, so Damien couldn't leave.

"Get out of my way" he said, his voice deep and clearly angry. He looked scary like that, but Shayne felt like he had to try to stop him. He hasn't felt determined like that ever before.

"I won't! Please, just listen to me! He was nothing for me, I was just scared! I thought I lost you, that our friendship was ruined! That I have ruined it!" he tried to explain, but Damien seemed like he didn't even listen to him.

"Get. Out." he said once again, placing his hand on the blonde's shoulder, trying to push him away, but he resisted.

"No, please! Let me explain it! I was confused, I drinked again, I was just... I don't know! But i felt nothing to him! And after we did it I regretted it immadietely, I swear! I just thought it would make me feel like I had someone! He was just a subtitute, nothing more!" he kept trying.

"Let me out Shayne or I don't vouch for myself" he almost threatened him, but Shayne wasn't afraid of getting punched or anything. He was only afraid of Damien leaving him now.

"Do what you want to me! Punch me, kick me, kill me, whatever, but please, don't leave me now! I won't handle it if you leave... Just please. You're the one that I want. Don't do it to me... Don't leave me!" he said, feeling he was very close to crying. He tried to rest his hands on Damien's shoulder, but the burnette just pushed them away, not saying anything. "Please... Do something! Say something to me! Answer me!" he spoke again, trying to move closer to him again, but then Damien just walked him around, so now his back was rsting on the door.

"Anything?" he asked, sounding scary again. Shayne gulped, but nodded slowly.

"Anything" he responded. Then Damien started to walk towards him, and Shayne automatically took a step back. But Damien didn't stop, so Shayne also kept walking back, facing him the whole time until he felt the couch behind him.

"So I am the one that you want, huh?" he asked, sounding so calm it was even more terryfying.

"Yes. You are the only one..." Shayne whispered.

"Don't be afraid. You were not afraid of fucking that guy, or I should say, letting him fuck you... Then say it, louder" he intimidated.

"You are the only one that i truly want, Damien. Please... Forgive me" he said a little bit louder.

"So why did you do that?"

"Because... I wanted you, but I couldn't get you. I needed someone to... to..."

"To fuck you instead of me?"

"It's not about fucking! I just wanted... I wanted to be punished. To feel pain. I felt forrible after what I did to Courtney and you, I felt evil... I still feel that way"

"You still feel you're an evil person?"

"Yes"

"You still feel you deserve the pain?"

"Yes"

"You still think you need to be punished?" Damien asked his, his voice breaking, his body shaking with anger. Shayne gulped again, still being pushed towards the couch. And the nodded slowly.

"Yes" he answered and then felt like the brunette pushed him roughly , so he landed on the couch.

"Then you will have it" he almost growled at him and also leaned on the couch, grabbing the blonde's body and kissing him hard. His moves were rough, his hands trailing through the body below him. After the moment of shock faded away a bit, hayne also started to move, to kiss back, to touch Damien's back, neck, hair, face... He felt his hot skin, his tensed muscles, but mostly he could feel his fury. And it was scaring him.

The taller guy pulled away for a moment to take of his shirt, and Shayne did the same before they started to kiss again. But this kiss took much shorter, beacuse, soon Damien started to suck on his neck, pretty hard, the blonde was sure it would leave a mark on his skin. But just as scary it was, it was also so pleasurable and arousing... He liked that and hated at the same time. He wanted them to do this, but not that way. Not fulled with anger, not jealous, mad, scared... He wanted to feel love, not just arousal. But he also didn't want Damien to stop... He just hoped that afterwards they could talk again. And for now, he decided to try to enjoy himself.

Damien was digging his fingers into Shayne's arms, which hurted, but he didn't want it to stop. The pain made him feel better, somehow. He wanted the man above him to realase all his anger on him, to punish him for all he did to him, to other people. He wanted to deserve his love by bearing all of this, standing it. And he was doing pretty well so far.

Then he felt brunette's hands trailing down, to his belt. Shayne did the same, also starting to pull Damien's pants down. Soon they were only in their boxers, rubbing against each other and kissing.

"You want it so bad... You want to be punished..." Damien whispered, his voise still deep and dark.

"Yes... I deserve it" he moaned. Then he felt his friend grabbing him again and turning him, so now he was laying on his stomach, not back. He felt rough hads taking off his underwear. He knew it was still visible on his skin there what he did previous night... He felt so exposed. So ashamed... He wanted it to hurt again, though. He wanted Damien to punish him... He wanted it to be his absolution. he wanted to fix everything that way... He hoped he could. So he raised his back, standing on his hands and knees, bucking his hips to the brunette.

He felt Damien heavy breathing, he felt strong arms gripping his waist. He felt nervous, but he wanted it... He needed it.

"Please... Just do it" he whispered.

"Shut up" he answered and then the blonde heard the taller man taking his underwear off as well and then hands on his hips again. "So this is what you want? You want me to punish you?" he asked, spreading his ass cheeks.

"Yes..." Shayne whispered. He could hear the brunette spitting and the he felt fingers at his entrance. he was still a bit loosen from previous night, so it slipped pretty easily. THough the sensation was unresistable, again. And his words just made it even harder.

"You want to feel the pain?" he asked again, adding two more fingers at the same time. He hissed in pain at the feeling, but nodded quickly.

"Yes" he answered, pushing himself further into those finger, into Damien. Then he felt hand slapping his butt so he stopped. He understood it - Damien wanted to do it by himself. He felt another finger.

"You want me to hurt you?" he growled.

"Yes! I want it..." Shayne responded, moaning. He felt fingers leaving his hole, but then felt something bigger at the entrance.

"You want me to make you cry?" Damien asked. His voice was so terryfying and arousing at the same time.

"Yes..." he groaned. And then almost immadietely regretted it as the brunette entered him in one hard thrust. He put his face in the pillow, so the shout wouldn't be that loud, but it didn't muffled it fully. But then, after the pain faded away  _a bit_ , he could feel pleasure again. Damien was thrusting into him in quick pace, hard, rough, digging his giners into his hips.

"You want me to make you scream?' he asked louder, fucking him steadily.

"Yes!" Shayne answered, pushing back against his firend abdomen again, but then felt another slap. Much ahrder han the previous one.

"Are you evil?" Damien asked him, growling again.

"Yes! I am!"

"Are you bad!?"

"Yes!"

"So you should get punished!/ get hurt!? Get fucked like that!?"

"Yes! Oh God, I should!" the blonde almost cired, the pain overwhelming him.

"Do you deserve all of this!?" he shouted at him, thursting even harder.

"YES!" he shouted back.

"NO!" he heard and then got pushed and fell to the ground, hitting it hard. He slowly ogt onto his knees again and looked back. Damien was sitting on the couch, naked, covered in sweat and with look so terryfied... Tears were running down his cheeks and he was panting. Just as Shayne.

"You don't deserve this..." he started, talking so quietly, shaking the whole time his voice breaking again. "You're not a bad person... You're not evil" he continued. He helped Shayne get onto the couch again and kissed him lightly on his forehead, tracing his hands through his face, through his face so softly yet desperately.

"What are you taling about... I am horrible... Don't you see what I've done?" Shayne whispered through their sweet kisses.

"Stop it... You're good. You just made a mistake. Everybody does... Please, just stop getting down on yourself... Trust me. I know you are good..." he kept talking and they laid on the couch again. This time Damien was on his back while Shayne was laying on him, his head resting on his chest while the brunette was hugging him, hissing his forehead.

"Damien... I'm so sorry..." Shayne whispered.

"I'm sorry too..." he heard him whisper back. Then the blonde kissed him again, on the lips, with passion. But it wan't rough... It was just lovingly. "But now... Please, take me. I want to be yours... Nobody's else. No more" he whispered into brunette's ear. And the man nodded,resting his hands on Shayne's back again while the blonde placed his legs on both sides of Damien's hips. He raised his body a bit to let him slide inside him again, this time slowly, though. And then they started to move, together, synchronized. Their moves were slow at first, their chest were pressed against each other, their lips touching.

"I needed this so much... I waited for this so long..." Shayne moaned softly.

"I know, Shayne... Me too..." Damien said thorugh his groans.

"Thank you, Damien" the blonde whispered before ending their talk by another passionate kiss. They started moving faster and faster. Shayne placed his hands on Damien's shoulders, rasining his torso a bit, while the man below him was still grabbing his hips. The blond was riding him while the brunette was helping him lower and raise his body whateer way the needed. It felt like they were made to do it together. They knew which move would be the best for the other, how to give pleasure, how to take it.

"I'm close" Damien said after pulling back from the kiss.

"Me too..." Shayne whispered before kissing again. And soon, he came onto his lover's chest, while he felt brunette coming inside him. THey didn't scream in pleasure only beacuse they were kissing, so their loud groans just got stuck in their mouths. After they leaned buck, Damien pulled out and they just laid on the couch, feeling exhausted, but also relieved.

"Thank you" Shayne whispered again, kissing Damien on the cheek.

"Thank you too, Shayne... And goodnight" he responded, pulling his arm around his lover.

"Goodnight, Damien" he managed to answer before falling asleep in his arms.


	22. Raise Your Hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morning after, they talk.

Damien woke up, feeling sun light on his bare skin, white sheets of the bed below him and a head of his best friend resting on his shoulder. They had moved to Shayne's bed in the middle of the night, as they had felt a bit cold on the couch, though they could use each other's body heat. They had moved quickly to the bedroom and fell asleep again there... The blonde was still sleeping, his warm breath enfolding over skin of his chest and neck. It was actually a nice feeling, a bit ticklish, but nice. He moved his hand to Shayne's head, carresing his hair with his fingers, playing softly and slowly with his ears and tracing his palm over his jaw lightly... But he was very carefull al the time. He didn't want to wake his lover up... He wanted to watch him like that as long as he could.

He looked at his lover and soft smile appeared on his face. He lowered his head so he could place sweet kisses on his cheeks and forehead, very softly and carefully, though. He wanted him to sleep, to rest... He thought Shayne deserved after all he came through. He started to recall everything from the night as he was carressing the blonde... At first, he was lost in the good memories. How they talked, drinked their tea... How they kissed and made love to each other. And how they fell asleep, together, tangled in their embraces. It was all so sweet and lovely... but it wasn't everything what happened.

After a while he thought about other memories, though he tried to avoid thinking about them. The memory of finding about Shayne's night with the stranger... And even worse memory of what he had done to the blonde after he found out. He was so violent, so brutal... He hurted him.

Is he still in pain?, he asked himself. Shayne's face looked so peaceful and calm, but brunette felt like he had to check everything. To make sure that it wasn't as bad as he remembered it... So he slowly freed himself from his friend embrace, moving to his lower body. He grimaced as he saw bruises on his lover's hips and waist, but he needed to see more, to reveal what was under the sheets. He slowly grabbed them and pulled away from the body below him. And was instantly filled wit disgust.

Shayne's body was beautiful, that was for sure. Even in its current state. But when he saw all the marks he left on him, he could appreciate how amazing his muscles, his bones and skin were. He could only think about those red 'finger prints' on his inner thighs, his ass cheeks... They looked really badly, ad the worst part was that he perfectly remembered every single one of them. He remembered as he slapped his lover, as he was diiging his finger into his hips... As he fucked him rough.

He slowly touched his hips, scared of hurting him even more, and then pushed them ligthly apart, so he could see the part he feared the most. And he saw it - loosened, red and dirty from the dried blood. Wounded entrance... wounded by Damien himself.

"Still not enough for you?" he heard Shayne's sore and quiet voice, as the blonde looked at him, still not fully conscious. Man slowly raised his body, rubbing his eyes and smirking... But the grin faded away quickly as he saw Damien's terryfied look. "Hey, what happened? Is something wrong?" he asked, also worried now.

"Is something wrong? Do you really need to ask? Just look at yourself!" Damien almost shouted at him. He was shaking with anger, though his fury was directed towards himself, not his friend. The blonde turned red on his face, almost as the colour of the marks on his skin, and he tried to cover himself with the sheets. But Damien didn't let him, taking them and throwing to the ground.

'Oh my God... Just look what I've done to you... I'm a fucking monster!" the brunette whispered. Shayne stod on his knees on the bed, moving towards the other man, but Damien quickly got out of the bed, almost jumping to the floor. "No! Please, don't... I don't want you to get hurt again!" he almost cried.

"Damien, what are you talking about? These are just... These are nothing" Shayne tried to calm him down, with no positive effect though, he only made Damien more angry.

"Stop it! It is not nothing! It's very much! Too much..."

"Please, just listen to me... it was a crazy night, but we came through it and it all turned out good. Please... Just let's talk about it, peacefully..." the blonde tried once again.

"Turned out  _good_? What the fuck are you talking about, Shayne? How could something like that be good?" he asked. His friend tried to move closer again, but Damien took another step back. "Please, don't... I did something horrible to you. You should hate me right now! You should..." he continued, but the blonde didn't let him finish.

"Oh, shut it... Don't you remember what you told me last night? It was just a mistake... Everybody makes mistakes..." Shayne spoke.

"Just a mistake? No, Shayne, it's not just a mistake... I fucking wounded you, don't you understand!? What if I did something more? What if I broke your bone, would it still be just a mistake? And I didn't ven put a condom on! I'm clean, but what if I didn't!?" he kept shouting.

"What if, what if, who cars what if? Please, Damien... This night was the best one in my life, it started horribly, I can agree, but at the end, I think it all happened for a reason... It was all good"

"Good? No, Shayne, no! Good things do not leave people wounded after! They do not make men hurt their best friends, people they care aboiut... How could you say it had any good reason?"

"I know it was good."

"Why!?"

"I just know it!"

"How!? Tell me, dammit! Why do you say it was good!? Why!?"

"Because it made me realize I loved you!" Shayne shouted, stopping all their motions and movement. Damien goggled his eyes at his friend, as the blonde was looking down. They were staring at each other like that for a long while, both naked, breathing heavily after the fight...

"You... You what?" brunette finally asked, stuttering. He couldn't believe what he heard, he was sure it was just his imagination... Almost sure. Shayne wasn't responding, though, just looking down, avoiding Damien's eyes. So he jumped on the bed again and moved to his lover, putting his hands softly on blonde's face, trying to make him look at him. "Please, look at me... Shayne, what have you said? Shayne?" he started to ask, almost panicking again. "Shayne, answer me, I beg you!' he almost shouted again.

Shayne raised his head slowly and looked straight into Damien's eyes. His eyelids were red as he was about to cry, but he still lookedso stunning... Damien would kiss the hell out of him if he wasn't so desperate for getting his answer. So he just looked into those bright eyes with his brown ones, so close to mental breakdown. He couldn't stand so much emotions...

"I love you".

Those words sounded impossible for the brunette. So unnatural, so strange... and yet so right when they came out from this mouth, from those pink lips.

"Wha... What? Shayne, are you..." he mumbled quietly, as the blonde moved his face even closer to his'.

"I love you, Damien" he repeated. And then he felt those sweet lips on his cheek, then on the other... And then they lips met. The kiss was slow, careful, calm... But it felt just so much better than the previous ones. It wasn't that sensual, that passionate... But it made Damien believe in words he had heard just few seconds before. And made him realize what he should say as well.

"I love you too, Shayne" he whispered, trying to hold his tears, as he traced his fingers into those messy blond hair, onto those not shaved yet cheeks... "I loved you so much... I love you" he kept whispering, letting the tears run down his cheeks. He felt those warm lips stopping them there, though.

"Cry, Damien... We need it. We need to let it all out.. Finally" he said, also shaking. And then they both cried, falling onto the bed again, touching each other, needing more warm, more of each other... And then they just laid down, tangled, snuggling at trading soft, sweet kisses.

"I love you..." Damien repeated once again. And he truly meant it.


	23. Flower in the Sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Damien takes him for a trip.

Shayne was resting his head on the car window. Though he was getting a bit tired and had to hide his yawns, he didn't want to go to sleep yet. He wanted to look at the man next him... Damien was lookin at the road as he was driving the car, humming quietly to the music on the radio, with his glasses on. He probably somehow sensed that the blonde was staring at him, because he turned to him for a while and smiled softly before turning back to look at the road again. This one smile was enough for Shayne, though. And this one look of those beautiful brown eyes... it just made him happy. He could sleep.

***

When he woke up, the whole trembling and bumping of the car was gone. Also, he woke up feeling something under his neck and head. He slowly recognized the thing as Damien's jacket, rolled as if someone wanted to use it as a pillow. And he realized, that he was the one who used it as a pillow, not intentionally, though.

"You were bumping your head on the window, so I put it there" he heard his friend's voice out of nowhere. He turned to the left, seeing Damien on the driver seat.

"Thanks... Why have we stopped?" he asked, looking around. It was darker than when he fell asleep. The car was surrounded by grass, he could also see some trees in the distance... and a small house that looked familliar in some way.

"Because that's the spot. We arrived some time ago, but I didn't want to wake you up..." the brunette explained. Shayne looked at his phone, confused and saw that it was already 8 PM.

"You're too polite... Did you get any sleep? We were supposed to switch..." he started, but saw his friend smile widely and stopped.

"No, I didn't... I was busy looking at you" he answered, making Shayne blush.

"That's sweet" he said, leaning for a kiss. A light one, they didn't want to make out here... Not at this moment, at least. "But also a bit creepy" he joked. Damien laughed a bit and then pulled off. "Where are we, exactly?" he asked.

"Don't you remember" Damien asked with a grin. "Then let's walk around, maybe you will recognize it" he said and they did as he said. Damien put on his jacket back as they walked towards the small house. "Still nothing?"

"Wait, isn't that..." Shayne started, when they got closer to the building. But he didn't need to finish the question - he knew the answer. He realized when they were. It was the same lakehouse where they were spending their vacations with freidns few times in the past. "How?" he asked, very excited.

"As usual. I rented it" the brunette answered, smiling again and placing his arm over Shayne shoulders. They kissed again, this time for longer and with much more passion. Shayne was the one to dominate in this one, pulling Damien litghly by his her to lower his head, using his toundue and then moving his lips to the neck.

"For how long?" he asked after they pulled off for a while.

"Five days"

"Five? How much do I owe you, then?"

"Kiss me like that one more time and we're square" Damien answered and Shayne gladly did so, making the kiss even more passionate. At the end he bit runette's lower lip sligthly, which drived a sweet moan from him. "Enough, save them for the night... Now, wanna go swimming?" he asked. SHayne liked the idea, so they both quickly entered the house, placed their bags from the car there and changed their clothes for the swimming trunks. After that they almost runned towards they lake shore. As had realized where ther were, he recalled almost everty detail of this place. He remembered the path to the platform perfectly and got there few seconds before Damien.

"That wasn't fair, I couldn't see the way, I had to go through the grass" he started to explain himself, but was shut down by another kiss from his boyfriend. "Alright, I lost" he admitted and they walked to the end of the deck and sat on the edged. Shayne slowly dipped his toes in the water. It was nice and warm, just as bare skin of the brunette next to him. He leaned to rest his head on his shoulder, leaving a soft kiss on collar bone, which made Damien giggle a bit.

"It's perfect..." the blonde whispered, looking at his lover. The man also looked down at his face and gave him a kiss on the nose.

"Yes, it is..." he started, tracing his fingers to blonde hair of his boyfriend. Shayne smiled at that feeling, he liked when Damien was playing with his hair like that. But then he felt the hand trailing lower, to his back and started to caress it slowly. "But you know would make it even better?" he asked, almost purring at his ear.

"Tell me" Shayne whispered.

"If you were in the water" Damien said and before Shayne realized what he was doing, he was pushed to the water. After he reached the surface, he tried to grab his friend by his leg and pull him to the lake as well, but the brunette kept dodging. "C'mere, you dork!" he said, laughing.

"As you say, darling!" Damien answered and jumped over the blonde, diving into the water and after a while came up behind Shayne to grab him. At first he tried to free himself from the grip, thinking the brunette was trying to pull him down and sink him, but then he realized Damien was actually hugging him from behind. Shayne chuckled and turned his face to kiss the man behind him. They slowly started to make out in the water. It was a bit messy and not very convenient, but they enjoyed it - it made them both feel more intimate, somehow.

"Those five days will be awesome" Shayne whispered at some point.

"Of course they will. Know why?" Damien asked, playing with his blonde, and now also wet, hair.

"Tell me" Shayne responded, smiling as he looked into those big dark eyes.

"Because I love you" he heard and even though it wasn't the first time Damien said that to him, he felt his heart beating much harder.

"I love you too, Damien" he answered and their lips met again as the sun was setting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be a bit later than usual - probably On Saturday/Sunday (depends on your time zone)


	24. Summertime

Damien finally left the forest and made it to the road. He saw a bus stop with a bench on the other side. He looked on his clock to realize he had around a minute or two until the bus was going to arrive - so actually was very lucky he made it, cause on his way he almost got lost in the woods. But despite his 'good luck', he wasn't in mood for celebrating at all - not because he had to left his vacations with his friends early. He had enough fun, he could come back home, espiecially to help his mother. He was still upset about the way he and Shayne parted. They finally spoke to each other, but it didn't help at all. It actually just made it worse... They always were clearing everything between them after fights pretty quickly, so when now he was leaving without any agreement or something like that, he was worrying about their friendship... But he had to keep going. The bus could arrive at any moment.

He was gonna cross the road when he heard footsteps behind him. Someone was running towards him, so the boy quickly turned... and saw Shayne. His friend was running pretty fast and definitely had a hard time bogging down so he would run into Damien if the boy would catch him at the right moment and stop him.

"Shayne, what the fuck?" he asked, completely confsued and surprised. Shayne rested his hands on taller boy's shoulders, trying to catch his breath, as he was panting pretty hard. He looked like he sprinted the whole way from the lakehouse to him. "Are you okay?" he asked him, a bit worried.

"Yeah, just give me a minute..." he answered, still a panting. After a while he stood straight and looked at Damien, whole red on his face.

"Why the hell did you run? WHat happened?" Damien asked, laughing a bit. He haven't seen his friend exhausted like that in a while.

"I couldn't find you in the forest, and I knew your bus was going to come soon, so I had to run..." he said, reminding Damien of the bus. He could hear some vehicle in the distance... But he was very close to the bus stop, he could made it in time. Now Shayne definitely wanted to tell him something and he wanted to hear it.

"Okay... So what happened?" he asked.

"I... I-I wanted to apologize. I'm really sory, dude, I acted like an asshole... I'm sorry" he finally spoke, suttering a little. His words made Damien feel very relieved in some way... He had been really worried about their relation before, and now all his troubles seemed to be... gone. He realized he wasn't mad at Shayne at all. He was more mad at himself, at their friends who kinda caused the whole awkward situation... But mostly he was mad at thier misunderstanding. Because he was only joking back there at the lake, right? Shayne was his friends... He didn't want to make it awkward. He was just fooling around, nothing more...

And now, when Shayne apologized, he realized it was everything he needed. It just showed him, that Shayne also didn't want that, that it was just som stupid mistake. Their friendship was as strong as before... And they could talk again.

"It's nothing... I made a stupid joke, I should be sorry, you know" he started. He felt a little awkward explaining it to his friend, but he wanted to clarify everything.

"No, stop it, you just made a joke and I... I was stupid. Please, let's forget it" he said. They looked at each other, both feeling that they were honest. Damien could still feel that there was something they should say, one more thing they should talk about... But neither of them seemed like they wanted to do it now. Though he felt happy they could talk again, he didn't want to talk about some things, at least. It was a bit stupid, he knew it... But he felt a little bit scared of it, also. They just reunited, he didn't want to risk another fight... He wanted just to enjoy the moment. And he leaned for a nice, warm bear hug.

They stayed like that for a moment, until he felt Shayne body shaking a bit. At first he felt a bit weird cause he thought his firend was crying... But then he heard his laughter. He also started to laugh and for a long whole they both were just standing there,in each other embrace, and laughing, very loud. So loud that they realized the bus's arrival a bit too late.

"Oh shit!" Damien said, when he saw it driving past them. He tried to run after it, but the vehicle didn't stop. So he sat on the bench on the bust stop, dropping his bags on the ground. Shayne walked towards him and sat next to him, petting him lightly on the back.

"Sorry, that's also my fault... But I had to talk to you... Sorry" he said, a bit embarassed. The brunette laughed though and put his arm around the other boy's shoulder to shake him in a friendly gesture.

"That's fine... as long as you wait with me for the next bus. It should arrive in two hours..." Damien said, looking at his friend.

"Sure, man" Shayne replied and for a while they were just silent. It was very hot, they were sweating a lot in the sun... But they kinda like it. They shared a water bottle, sitting next to each other, touching wet skin of their arms and shoulders. The banch wasn't that small, they could easily sit the other way, so they wouldn't touch... But they didn't seem to care. And Damien was happy about that.

***

Few years later, close to this bus stop, in the bedroom of the lakehouse, the brunette got off of his lover's chest and leaned on the white sheets next to him. They both were panting. They took a shower just a while ago, and were sweaming before, but they felt like they needed to wash themselves again. They were very sweaty and covered in cum... but they didn't feel dirty, though. They felt just... right. They were laying side to side, trading nice kisses and other caresses after they both came. Damien was just lost in those bright blue eyes, running his fingers through the wet blonde hair while the other hand was circling around his nipples. He was so focused on his man's beauty, he didn't realize he was talking to him.

"Sorry... Could you repeat, honey?" he asked him. He saw a bit of blush on blonde's face after he heard how he called him. Damien liked that blush.

"I asked if you want to take a shower..." he repetaed himself.

"That might be a good idea... But I think I have a better one" he answered.

'Of course you have" Shayne laughed.

"Shhh, just get up" the brunette said and then leaded his boyfriend down the stairs, to the door.

"Shouldn't we get dress before we leave?" the other asked.

"That would ruin the whole fun" he replied and they both laughed as they left the lakehouse, still naked and then runned towards the lake until they got to the platform. And when thet stood on the edge, naked, with their skin pale in the moonlight, it reminded brunette of something. So he leanedto rest his arm on Shayne's shoulders with a cocky grin on his face.

"Hey, babe, what's going on?" he asked. The blonde looked down, a bit sad, which made him worried. He didn't want to make his boyfriend feel guilty again about some stupid fight they got when they were still teenagers. But it seemed like Shayne still felt ashamed of it. "Sorry, I didn't want to..." Damien whispered, leaving soft kiss on his forehead.

"No, that's fine... I acted like an asshole then, you know? But I now think I know why... You know, I think I liked you more even back then..." the blonde started.

"I think it was the same with me..." Damien said, nodding slowly. Shayne laughed a bit nervously at that.

"Yeah, that was awkward... It was our last time at this lake, right?" he asked.

"Yes... That kinda why I brought you here... YOu kno,w to make it right this time" he said. Shayne smiled ligthly and kissed him on the cheek.

"Then you did it, darling... I love you" Shayne whispered to him as Damien was kissing him back on his neck.

"I love you to" he responded. They were making out again in the nice warm night air around them.

"Damien..." Shayne said quietly as the brunette was running his hand on his shoulders and chest, turning them a bit so the blonde was back to the water.

"Yeah, honey?"

""I see what you're doing..."

"What do you mean, love?"

"You're turning us..."

"And...?"

"If you're gonna throw me into the water, I'm gonna kick your ass"

"Is that a threat?"

"Yes it is. Stop pushing me to the edge"

"I'm not..."

"Don't you dare"

"What do you mean... Wow, look, is that a dargonfly?"

"Where...? Oh, fu-"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End.
> 
> Thanks for reading everyone, thanks for 500 hits and for all the opninions!  
> Soon I'm gonna post another work, so stay tuned!


End file.
